10 steps to stop loving a guy and stop suffering. Unfortunately, even the strongest and most harmonious relationships at one moment can crumble like a house of cards. It is sometimes quite difficult to predict or prevent this sad event. And if this happened, is it possible to forbid yourself to continue to have feelings for the once beloved person? In any case, breaking up a relationship is a huge stress that needs to be endured with minimal losses. Below you will find comprehensive answers to the questions “how to fight attachment” and “how to stop loving a guy.”
However, first of all, you yourself must realize that falling out of love is the only right decision in your case. And clearly understand whether you are in love or have a real feeling towards your partner. But how to understand that there is no point in fighting for them anymore?
- Trust has disappeared from your relationship. Lies and endless nit-picking poison the union, making your stay together simply unbearable.
- You have ceased to respect each other and often turn to insults, accusing each other of new sins.
- There is no intimacy between you. And it’s not even the lack of regular sexual relations. You are simply no longer two halves of a single whole.
- A man uses physical or mental violence against you. From such “poisonous” relationships should be exited immediately!
- You have radically different life priorities. One of you strives to develop, while the other is stuck and marking time, not wanting to change anything.
A widespread phrase that, oddly enough, works. Rest assured, over time, your pain will dull, and perhaps even recede altogether. Therefore, be patient and remember the great words of King Solomon. And yes, this too shall pass!
Understand and forgive
If your breakup with a young man was due to some of his misconduct, try to honestly understand his motives. What motivated him at that very moment, why he acted this way and not otherwise. Just remember that understanding and finding an excuse are completely different things. Do not confuse these concepts. Otherwise, after a couple of minutes of such an analysis, you will again flood the pillow with tears and regret what happened.
The best way to fall out of love is to be as busy as possible. Ideally, so that you have neither the time nor the strength to scroll through the happy film of past relationships in your head. Now you have enough time to devote yourself to all kinds of hobbies, or, finally, to pursue your own career. In the end, shopping and regular gatherings have not been canceled. And the healing effect of such events has long been proven and does not require confirmation.
Unleash your emotions
It is much worse if you restrain yourself instead of crying enough. Of course, this does not mean that you need to walk in mourning day and night with a tearful face, frightening those around you. But at home, being alone with yourself, you can afford to cry. And even scream. Such an outlet of emotions is extremely necessary, especially if you have always and under any circumstances tried to “keep face”
Don’t bring up the past
Try to get rid of any reminder of the former chosen one and feelings for him as soon as possible. During your relationship, you certainly have accumulated a sufficient number of such “reminders”. Only now, each of them, like a sharp blade, will reopen your already wounded soul over and over again. Therefore, all photographs, correspondence, and so on – should be immediately removed from view. Yes, yes, and that huge teddy bear too!
Don’t Idealize Your Ex
The position “he is actually good, he just broke down” is obviously wrong. Stop lying to yourself, each time coming up with ridiculous excuses for this or that act of a man. Admit honestly that there are enough negative aspects in it that you can no longer put up with.
Engage in self-esteem
Now is the time to tighten your figure, do yoga or meditation. Update your wardrobe, buy cosmetics that you have long dreamed of. Every time you pass by a mirror, notice your virtues and smile at your reflection.
Forget words, remember actions
Of course, every girl loves compliments, and even more loves the one who knows how to say them beautifully to her. But if we judge the union of two mature people, then words, even if beautifully pronounced, cannot be equivalent to actions. And how many actions committed for you can you remember? Not? That’s it!
Think about the future
And frankly, for the first time in a long time, answer yourself the question, will it be happy and cloudless next to this person? Do you want to continue living this life? Just discard sentimental emotions and try to reason honestly. If your answer is in the affirmative and consists of three letters, then there should be no reason for sadness. Are you ready to continue to endure humiliation, sacrificing your own life to a person who still does not appreciate it? Again “no”? You see how simple everything is!
Stop playing the victim
And thereby expose yourself in an unfavorable light. You should not complain to your friends and mother about how the “bad boy” offended the “good girl”. And even more so in the smallest details to wash dirty linen in public. The longer you feel sorry for yourself, the longer your memory will take you back to that same person. But you were determined to forget him, weren’t you?
Don’t be alone
In such a difficult emotional period, you will need the support of family and friends more than ever. They will be able to cheer you up and give good advice. Do not refuse to attend noisy friendly parties. Visit relatives. Make new interesting acquaintances. Feel desired, beautiful and successful again. Just don’t be alone with yourself and your own thoughts. As a last resort, find a good psychologist and make an appointment with him. There is nothing shameful in the fact that you have realized the problem and are trying in every way to solve it.
Before you decide to stop loving a man, forgive him for all wrongs and realize that you must move on. But already without him. Leave all memories far behind and mentally thank him for a valuable life lesson. Believe me, some troubles happen for good, and some relationships are given only for experience.