Many can recall a relationship that felt more like hard work than a fun hobby. It happens: a person feels that something is not right, but cannot understand. But there are several symptoms that allow you to accurately determine that the relationship is a burden.
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“Barlak Syndrome”
This is the most common symptom, but also the least noticeable. Most often it affects men. Well, yes, they were brought up that way: a man must … And further down the list. And the men are pulling the “burlak” strap, turning gray, catching heart attacks at the age of 40, someone becomes an inveterate drunkard, someone gets a mistress, and someone lives like in a bad dream. And it’s hard to present: the wife is smart, the mistress, the children have grown up, they have been educated, and the house is a full bowl.
But something is wrong. But everything is simple: everyone sat on it, legs hung down and drive. Yes, sometimes dissatisfied with something. Wives often sin in that, having saddled their spouse, they come up with an endless decree for themselves, demand an annual vacation on the seas, oceans, and they themselves attend a bunch of courses on nail extensions, eyelashes and other crap, not always working in their profession. Frequent history.
The same goes for girlfriends. While the guys are young, it is not particularly noticeable. But as soon as you start living together, such moments come out very quickly. “Come, take, pay, I want, give …”, capricious pout, dried pasta and sleep on the couch. And the boy does not know what could be different. But he readily harnesses himself and begins to drag.
Design inclinations
As soon as there is a desire to change something in a partner, we can safely say that the relationship begins to burden.
There is an opinion that at the very beginning, partners wear rose-colored glasses. They do not notice bald spots, fullness, protruding ears, birthmarks and crooked teeth. And indeed it is. Over time, people get used to each other, and do not notice age-related changes in appearance. Moreover, loving couples find them quite cute and attractive. It is quite acceptable if one of the partners begins to worry about his appearance and try to improve it.
Especially this chip is inherent in women. And it’s all great! But not ice at all if you want to change not yourself, but your partner. Here it is, an ambush! This is a direct hint that love does not just go out. She was completely blown away. It’s one thing to agree to a circular facelift that a spouse raves about, and another to poke her nose into sagging breasts after feeding or into a network of wrinkles on her face. Well, this applies to couples who live together for a long time. As for the young, it is quite natural to nitpick in style, in the same appearance and other things that can change in a short time.
Secrets behind seven seals
There is a lot of talk about trust within a couple. Young people are trumpeting this pathetically on every corner. But it is only natural that everyone has their own skeletons in the closet. At the same time, everyone has the right to privacy. Problems begin when you do not want to talk about simple things: where did you go, what did you buy, who called. The appearance of little secrets, more like lies, is a wake-up call for lovers.
The little one always turns into a big one. It grows like a snowball. It is sad to watch people who have duplicate accounts, second SIM cards and other “gadgets” of another life. The presence of betrayal is not necessary at all, a person simply does not want to let someone into his life. And if a partner becomes this someone, it’s sad.
No less sad when endless surveillance begins. Anyone can imagine being Sherlock Holmes. And no one is immune from this. The question is, why does the desire for total control arise? Partner gave a reason? At the very stigma in a cannon, which means there is no trust in a loved one? There are many factors, and all of them are not unfounded. That’s just the reason – fading relationships.
“When you come home, you sit there…”
The desire to be alone is quite natural. Especially if the person himself is an introvert, then questions usually do not arise. In a loving couple, there are such periods when everyone can do their own thing in complete silence, but being near. And it doesn’t bother them at all. This is good. The husband watches football, the wife enthusiastically knits another napkin, and both are silent.
So, they will exchange a couple of phrases, and again silence. Why not? It is worse when the presence of a person begins to strain, annoy, tire and just enrage. Moreover, it starts to “vomit” on the actions of a person: either he champs, then he stomps, then his voice suddenly became disgusting, and even from the smell of the body he generally turns out. This already completely crosses all boundaries, and there is no point in continuing such a relationship.
Familiar as house slippers
Many say that they do not want to leave just because they are used to a partner. They can name +100500 reasons why everything seems to be quite normal.
It’s just a crazy illusion. Why experience negative emotions, and constantly try to balance the scales of the relationship? This is Sisyphean labor. Moreover, the partner is also having a hard time!
You have to be very thick-skinned in order not to feel changes in the relationship. What to do in such cases? That’s certainly not necessary to rape each other with empty attempts at rapprochement. Stanislavsky won’t believe it… You have to let your partner become just another story and just walk away into the sunset. Without hysterics and civilized.
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