Cheating Husband: 9 Reasons For Male Infidelity. A cheating husband is a heavy blow for any woman. But what if there is an excuse for such an act, or at least a logical explanation? Psychologists often call adultery a problem for both partners. However, can a devoted woman be to blame for her husband’s infidelity? 9 reasons for cheating that are most common in marriage – further in the sections of the article.
1. Routine and boredom.
Long-term relationships noticeably become boring if you do not work on them. However, men who feel bored in marriage are in no hurry to improve the situation. Usually for one of two reasons:
- they have no time they are entrusted (by their wives or by themselves) with too many responsibilities, they have little time to solve family difficulties;
- about they don’t blame themselves for the situation and, of course, do not try to contribute to the development of the family.
If the spouse realizes that a complete calm has come in his personal life, and at the same time tries to fix everything, most often he succeeds. If not, then such a category of people usually simply ends the relationship and only after that is looking for others.
His generally meant by the routine in the male sense?
- Monotonous sex and even worse – “on schedule”.
- Stuck in a work-home-work cycle.
- Systematically repetitive behavior of the wife (for example, constantly “nags” or reacts neutrally to almost everything).
- An overly strict schedule of household chores (“on Monday and Thursday we eat fish, on Wednesday – only vegetables, on Saturday – cleaning, every other Sunday we go to my mother”).
- Relatively frequent suppression of personal interests and impulses for the sake of banal (and not critical) duties.
In order not to miss your man because of such a reason, it is important to look closely at his mood, not to ignore his desires, and try to make a difference. You don’t have to change everything drastically. Enough to allow yourself to improvise. You can spontaneously go to any cafe, instead of boring cooking and cleaning. Ask the grandmothers to sit with the children and spend a romantic day dedicated only to each other. Go hiking, amusement park, or any unfamiliar place. Change clothes together.
Cheating Husband: 9 Reasons For Male Infidelity.
2. Risk and danger.
Some husbands love to feel like “undercover agents.” They love risk and everything that comes with it. They are addicted to adrenaline, which is generated from the knowledge that they can be caught in the hot. As a rule, they are not particularly interested in even the mistresses themselves. The whole focus is on the thrill.
There is a category of people who need constant excitement, but do not even think about cheating. Why is that?
More successful men with adequate self-esteem cheat less often, as they are able to find risk in other areas of their lives. They are:
- engage in extreme sports;
- choose professions that require activity, speed of execution;
- not afraid to try hobbies that allow you to feel the drive, danger, emotional excitement.
Other husbands have a desire to seek their dose of adrenaline in infidelity due to dissatisfaction with life or psychological trauma. It is almost impossible to change such a person with your own strength and desire. This requires the help of a specialist and the personal desire of the spouse to work on the situation.
3. Sexual dissatisfaction.
One of the most banal, but, alas, common reasons. In the early stages of a relationship, sex is amazing. There is novelty, there is intrigue, there is a desire to try new things in bed. And most importantly – there is a desire to please and a fear of seeming like a “log”. That’s why some women, after a couple of months of relationships, from “insatiable cats” suddenly turn into “neurology patients” with eternal headaches.
Over the years, diversity is not added, which cannot be said about routine household chores. How can you make your intimate life brighter?
- Buy special toys, sexy lingerie, lubricants, pheromones.
- Learn more about role-playing games, their types, and rules.
- Try a new kind of intimacy or “hone your skills” (the Internet is full of material on improving the technique of oral sex, for example).
- Practice spontaneity. You can not tie sex to a specific time or place. If it is planned as another chore around the house like washing dishes, it is a failure.
- No 10-minutes during commercial breaks! It is better to learn to fully tune in to the process and not be distracted by a boiling pot on the stove, a yelling cat, or a messed up hairstyle.
- Frankly share their sexual fantasies with each other.
Another snag is the different level of emancipation and the fear to talk about unusual desires. If for a husband sex in a public place is the norm, and the wife throws a cloth over the cage with a parrot before the process, this is a problem. Here, again, a good specialist will help – a sexologist or a psychotherapist.
Cheating Husband: 9 Reasons For Male Infidelity.
4. Revenge and rebellion.
Excessive control on the part of the partner can also push to adultery. If the spouse digs all the time on the phone, correspondence, accuses her of infidelity due to being 10 minutes late after work, the husband will break loose. Moreover, in such situations, male logic is extremely simple: “If she’s already blowing my brains out because of cheating, then at least she does it for a reason.”.
The same thing happens in families where the wife constantly criticizes, humiliates her husband, or expresses herself at the expense of him. Moral pressure is an unpleasant thing that ends in impulsive decisions. After cheating of this kind, men may feel guilty. However, the more the missus continues to spread rot, the less regret and repentance remains with her chosen one.
5. Specific worldview.
Some men are firmly convinced that being polygamous males is in their blood. And you can’t go against the call of nature, because it’s like trying to live without food and water.
People of this type ignore centuries of evolution and social development for themselves, but are not ready to take the same attitude towards others. There is a huge paradox in their thinking.
Facts about the nature of polygamy Key snags
In nature, the meaning of the existence of a male really comes down to fertilizing as many females as possible. Who has seen a lion tearing its mane and running away from a pride because the lionesses got pregnant from him? In human life, this is quite a typical case. If the female goes to a stronger male who has taken the place of the previous leader, this is normal. The departure of a woman to another, more successful man is regarded by a polygamous spouse as a betrayal and venality. The male leader takes care of the safety of the entire flock (herd, flock, pride, etc.).A polygamous man is not ready to take responsibility for the women he sleeps with.
A person with such a worldview is extremely infantile and not ready for family life. To avoid a failed marriage, it is important to initially touch on the topic of infidelity and discuss attitudes towards them.
Cheating Husband: 9 Reasons For Male Infidelity.
6. Wounded ego.
Modern girls are increasingly trying to abandon the roles of housewives in favor of career and personal growth. Now women’s earnings are equal to men’s. And especially ambitious people often get more than their husbands. It is hard to find a man who will be sincerely glad that his wife’s income exceeds his own.
Next to a successful woman, a spouse can feel his failures more acutely. Even on the condition that the wife respects her chosen one and never blames him for a lower income, male pride still remains wounded. And there are two amendments:
- It doesn’t have to be just the material aspect… A girl may be more popular, more skillful in some occupation. Or she is simply much more often praised (clever, beautiful, hostess);
- the cause of this attitude is low self-esteem (often together with infantilism) or deep psychological trauma.
There is a change in consciousness. A man finds a woman who has achieved less than himself. With her, he feels more successful, strong, influential. In a sense, he even expresses himself at the expense of her. Next to his wife, he loses strength of mind, confidence.
It’s better to either not get along with such people at all, or learn to remind them of their own successes, to show that they are the main ones in the relationship. And you have to do it constantly.
7. Non-serious relationship.
Everything is simple here: he cheats because he does not respect his wife. He does not love her, he is also in no hurry to appreciate her. He married only because:
- relatives constantly pressed and demanded to marry;
- “All my friends are already with their families, but I am without”;
- the girl accidentally became pregnant and had to;
- was too young, hurried;
- once loved, but now the feelings are gone.
As a rule, such unions very quickly end in divorce, more often at the initiative of the wife.
8. Neurosis and suspiciousness.
Jealous men see betrayal almost everywhere. They are so afraid that their chosen ones will find someone on the side that they become real neurasthenics. Constant tension finds an outlet in the infidelity of the husbands themselves. Moreover, they are extremely aggressive.
The logic is this: Either she has already cheated on me, and I will take revenge on her, or she will change soon, and I’d rather be the first to do it. ”. The reason is again in uncertainty or injury.
Cheating Husband: 9 Reasons For Male Infidelity.
9. Changes in the wife.
In the caricatures, wives are depicted with curlers, in dressing gowns, with terrible masks on their faces, and, in principle, in a neglected form. And although such drawings are just satirically exaggerated parodies, many women (but not all) really relax too much in marriage.
“Love not for appearance, but for my inner world “ – weak excuse. These wives rarely try to develop, and their “inner world” is equated to the size of the simplest mini-aquarium. As a result, such persons stop:
- look after the appearance and carefully observe hygiene. This is not about makeup and styling, but about banal care – neat nails, clean hair, fresh breath;
- develop in a career What for? I’m married, my husband will provide”);
- learn new things, try different activities, find new interests (“I have no time, I have a husband and children”);
- try to please (precisely please, and not serve) the spouse (“He owes first, and then I ”).
Of course, such a transformation does not happen overnight. However, getting out of such a neglected image is even longer and more difficult.
So that cheating on your husband never turns out to be a reality, you will have to learn to listen to your man and try to work on relationships with him. Developing your marriage does not mean unquestioningly pleasing your spouse and indulging his whims. However, husbands appreciate women who know how to compromise and calmly but effectively resolve conflicts.
Cheating Husband: 9 Reasons For Male Infidelity.
