“Healing” effect of cheating on relationships: discoveries of sexologists. Cheating is a destructive phenomenon that cannot always be explained even to those who decide to take this step. Sexologists argue that the stories of patients are so twisted that in the end, cheaters are victims rather than accused. It’s unexpected, and at the same time so difficult. When couples try to get to the root cause at a sexologist’s appointment, the cheater usually exclaims, “How could you do this to me?” The cheater often replies, “I didn’t do it because wanted (s) to cheat or deceive you, but because I wanted this.
“Healing” effect of cheating on relationships: discoveries of sexologists
fun stats
In other words, these people were guided primarily by their desires, not taking into account how painful it would be for a partner. Let’s turn to statistics. About 63% of women said that they cheated because a new partner made them feel more alive, 39% regained confidence in their sexuality in such a cunning way, and 43% decided to return their butterflies in their stomach in this way, for 41% it is extremely important to experience new sensations that their partner did not agree to provide.
If we talk about male cheaters, then 89% of them are looking for sex, for 39% it is important to explore new desires, the same number of men are looking for a friend with whom they could sleep, 23% want to get back their “butterflies in their stomachs”. At the same time, it is important for 84% of cheaters of both sexes to know that they are cheating for the same reason.
Spoon of honey in a barrel of tar
Some progressive sexologists argue that cheating can have a good effect on relationships with a partner. Many patients said that infidelity helped save their marriage. How? With the help of a third-party partner, they were able to satisfy all natural needs and desires, which was not possible before for a number of reasons. Thus, cheaters return to marriage refreshed and satisfied, which positively affects the relationship.
Perhaps such a pattern of behavior will be acceptable for Western Europe and the United States, but most people in the post-Soviet space are unlikely to be able to accept such “healing” therapy for marriage, due to their conservative views on the institution of the family. But arguing with statistics is pointless. This helps many patients, but on the condition that both partners in a couple deliberately looked for sex on the side. But, as practice shows, cheating usually happens because an opportunity has turned up, and not as a result of a long and hilarious search.
Perhaps the cheaters wrestled with their conscience for a long time before getting into bed with another person. Perhaps it was an isolated incident or a long-term relationship. Be that as it may, 95% of cheating happens not out of revenge, and not out of a desire to annoy. Often this happens due to superficial motives – a person simply needs to throw out his sexual energy in a new way.
Don’t skimp on a second chance
If your partner has cheated, you don’t need to immediately pack his bags. Perhaps this betrayal will breathe life into your relationship. Find the strength within yourself to give the person another tiny chance. Of course, he will have to atone for his guilt. In some cases, the pain of the “victims” pays off with interest. After that, the relationship can improve significantly. If dissatisfaction with some aspect of life led to treason, you can discuss this problem and solve it once and for all.
It is also important to understand that betrayal, even if it leads to the improvement of relations in marriage, causes a surge of mistrust, resentment and suspicion of all mortal sins. This is a normal reaction of a partner, which must be reckoned with and respected.
“Healing” effect of cheating on relationships: discoveries of sexologists
