Unfortunately, some marriages fail. Once close people become strangers to each other and disperse in different directions.
If you were fastened with a hurricane, in the case of a very relevant after a divorce, the question will be how to deal with and with your spouse. And if you do that, you may want to say…
Why communicate at all?
If you have made the decision to maintain communication, then first understand why this is needed at all.
There are several options:
Here, people are driven by the fact that they have gone through so much together, and, therefore, after parting, it is necessary to be supportive.
Ask yourself, do you really want this now? “Now” is the key word here. If you want, and, most importantly, you can, then check: is there any hope of returning everything?
A divorce is a divorce. No one is allowed to do it and it is not possible to manipulate it. Are you saying that you want it in your life, and that it isn’t worth it? Then you can only applaud. Strong woman.
Just remember that you don’t have to keep the relationship. You don’t owe anything to anyone. Especially the former spouse;
- Because the person is good.
Sometimes it may seem that the ex-husband is simply an irreplaceable person. If you are a master, if you don’t have any luck and td It is difficult to get rid of it, but it is possible.
This feeling makes life very difficult. It is better not to communicate with even the most beautiful person, if it only makes you feel worse. And it is better to learn to live without the former as soon as possible. Otherwise, you will be spinning in this dependence, complicating life for yourself and for him;
This situation is more complicated. No one wants to say that it means “to communicate”. Communication has an EMOtional coloring. A where we are modest and sotrudonichat is priced. It is, after all, his child too.
How to communicate if you have children?
A desired child who appeared in love and harmony is wonderful. And whatever happens between the parents, the father has the right to see his child and take sympathy
Even more: it is his direct duty. While the children are small, meetings with the father can take place in the presence of the mother. If the contact is not accepted. It is possible to speak on a foreign territory and to produce it with other words.
How to communicate with an ex-husband?
Basic rules to follow in communication:
- Don’t do it in the man-made words, it’s worth it.
- Do not sort things out with a child, especially in a raised voice;
- Don’t forget to take it in price. You can achieve the opposite effect: dad will become good, and you will be bad;
- Don’t turn down help. Including financial. This is not for you, but for common children;
- Not wanted in Posu and not possable obidu or pride. It’s much harder all alone.
Your child doesn’t want to see you fight. It won’t hurt him that mom and dad don’t live together anymore. It will be hard for him to see that his parents have become enemies, and they are trying, like a cat with a dog, to constantly bite each other.
Therefore, try to minimize communication and leave communication only within the framework of the child.
5 general rules for communicating with an ex-husband
To keep aaatia, not to get depressed and feel strong @
- Don’t demand anything.
The exception is the health and needs of children. In all other respects, a divorce certificate is the document that frees you and him from all obligations. There is no “you should” anymore.
You can manifest female cunning: ask or hint. It works – good. It won’t work – well, okay, you can handle it yourself;
- Keep neutral.
Speak in an even tone, do not raise your voice, do not reproach for anything, do not start screaming. Any EMOs that accumulate like a snowball will lead to negative consequences for both. And all this will result in a big scandal;
- Get rid of the feeling of control.
Let the man breathe. He just got divorced, and your constant calls to fix the faucet, move the couch, or pick up the kid from school will make it feel like nothing has changed.
Such obsessive behavior is annoying. No it is there that you are in the middle of nowhere;
- Don’t think about the past.
There were many good moments in family life, and the bad, as you know, are forgotten very quickly. And, perhaps, one sad autumn evening over a glass of red, you will want to call and remember your common
On the part of the ex-spouse, such a thing is regarded as a confession of guilt, and such a veiled llhouse Nostalgia is a heavy burden that prevents you from breathing deeply. Therefore, crush it;
- Don’t talk about new relationships.
This would be a mockery. Even if you managed to maintain friendly relations, then the ex-husband is still your ex-man. And it will be very unpleasant for him to hear about your adventures. Especially if not much time has passed since the breakup.
He may wonder if a new interest caused your breakup. Why do you have the reputation of an unfaithful woman?
If this is practiced, it is possible to do this and to plan it in the new building.
TOP 5 advice for communication with an ex-husband
Breakups are always hard. Sovsem will most likely not be able to go through this painlessly. No more than what is what this is.
The following tips on how to communicate with your ex will help you.
- Conduct yourself with dignity.
Do not rush to extremes and do not rush to post photos of bouquets from another man, walking with a new cavalier. Impressions of you will not be the best;
This is what you need first. Remember what your ex-husband was unhappy with: hairstyle, cooking, imperfect figure. Take care of yourself. Having devoted time to self-development, you will occupy yourself with something, and you can distract yourself from sad thoughts;
- Don’t gossip.
No need to worry about it, except for the dogs and rods. Also, don’t be negative. By such behavior you humiliate not the former, you humiliate yourself. People around you will immediately see how bad and hurt you really are in your soul;
- Work out a communication plan with your children.
If you have a child, it is fair to discuss when and under what conditions the father will see him, and how much he should allocate for maintenance. Children should not get the impression that mom and dad don’t love them anymore.
Honestly explain the reason for the breakup and make sure that you are all still one family;
- Don’t become an enemy to your husband’s parents.
They were also part of your life. If after the divorce there are children left, then the help of the mother-in-law and the father-in-law can still be useful to you. Ain’t not, it’s just not worth getting others involved in your conscious decision to divorce.
It won’t be easy. The way of life will change, there will be a feeling that something is missing in the apartment. But divorce is not the end. This is just the beginning and a step forward.
Don’t be afraid of these changes. After all, everything that is done is for the best.