How to diversify the everyday life of a boring family life – advice from a psychologist. “Zili oni dolgo and happily.” Remember, in fairy tales, the plot was always interrupted at the wedding. Fairy tales taught us courage, friendship, mutual assistance. For some reason, the question: “How to live happily ever after?” stayed behind the scenes.
A well-known recipe for a happy family life is to bring variety to life. Then you won’t be bored. What is this? And how do you get the correct dosage?
Why diversity in family life is so important?
To introduce novelty into family life means, first of all, to show your indifference to whatever happens. This is not indifference to a partner, a desire to please and surprise him, and also to recharge with his positive emiyaya.
Diversity is a reminder of the importance of the family. This is especially important when there is a blockage on all fronts, and it seems that there is no strength. You both see children only at night, and nothing has happened in your bedroom for a long time, except for a sound sleep. Relationships are Labor that allows you to turn to true values, set priorities correctly, pay attention to loved ones.
However, diversity in family life is not always useful and appropriate. For example, in situations where “the ship goes to the bottom.”
As long as there are some problems that need to be resolved, it is not possible to do so. There will be as much benefit as from the restoration of the facade of a house whose foundation has cracked.
If you stop, that you try to ignore the brakes, but you don’t want to do that. Talk heart to heart, contact the experts. Save the family if both are interested in it.
TOP 7 ways to add variety to family life
- Give him gifts
If it is not private, it is not necessary to carry it Buy your spouse something that he has long wanted. The purchase doesn’t have to be expensive. Let it be a T-shirt or a trifle for the car. The main thing is beautifully packaged. This creates an atmosphere of a small holiday, intrigue.
The essence of a gift is not the thing itself, but the emotion. Who among us does not experience joy when unfolding gift paper. What will your gift tell him? About the fact that you tried, spent Your time, About Your attention to his needs and desires, about the desire to deliver a positive emotion.
But don’t build expectations. No need to pretend, as long as the skin is dry. No way, it’s not called: two words on one person. In addition, there is no need to hope and, moreover, hint at a return gift. Otherwise, your act will be regarded as barter.
5 rules for a happy life between husband and wife
- Don’t Forget About Touch
The romance of family life can be destroyed by habits. We react to kisses and hugs of a spouse much calmer than in the first days of a relationship. Often, such trifles as walking down the street, holding hands, completely remain in the past.
Think, having gone through so many years together, do you hug your husband when he meets you from work? How we are met by relatives is incredibly significant. It is the first few seconds from the moment we cross the threshold of the house that largely set the mood for the evening.
The spouse came home – tear yourself away from the stove / TV series / work. Meet him with a gentle smile, a kind word and a touch. This can melt the bright feelings that the husband managed to bury under a pile of problems during the working day.
- Speak words of support and approval
Many men are stingy with words. “In the registry office, I already said that I love you. If anything changes, I’ll let you know.” No, it is not necessary, so it is not necessary in the slaves and in other places. Just tell him what he wants to hear.
The usual “Don’t be upset”, “Everything will be fine”, “All this is trifles” do not fit here. These are phrases that devalue experiences. They talk about not wanting to touch the feelings of another person. Actually, that’s what happens next. And the fact that “everything will be fine” you cannot quarantine.
Replace them with “I know how hard you are trying for us”, “I see that you are upset, but I want to be there in difficult times”, “Maybe I can do something to help” and the like. Even “Everyone is bad, you are good” is not bad. Just say it with the right intonation, otherwise it will sound like a mockery. It would be appropriate to use “your” words.
The goal is to make the words of support and approval unique, addressed only to him. Then Your Husband will feel that these are not just standard phrases, but Love and attention to His feelings, Prisoners of special formulations.
- Spend quality time together
Side by side on the third floor and it is now possible in the community. In family life, quality compensation by quantity does not work. It turns out that you are close, but not together.
Travel is much better. Even if it’s a short weekend trip to a nearby town. Now the situation, the choice of places for walks and lunch, fees for the road – all that will become topics for discussion. The positive emotes you get from being around each other are the cement of a marriage.
Exhibition, water park, spa, skiing – anything will do. The main thing is to coordinate such leisure with your husband. Do not convince Him to go Anywhere against Will: You will only ruin your mood, and he will grumble that he spent the day off, do not understand what. My streams have to be tested in the living room in the workshop, in which the names of the choir are.
- Show care
With care, it is important not to overdo it. Otherwise, you run the risk of becoming a woman – “mommy.” You don’t always want to take care of such a woman in return. And custody of an adult male is a romance killer.
To diversify family life with care – So, go beyond the “Usual” care (like ironed shirts), but observe the measure. Such manifestations of care should be perceived as mini-events, that is, they should be unique and single!
- Create and keep traditions
Come up with little traditions just for the two of you. For example, every month on a certain day to go to a new restaurant. If you don’t want to do that, you can do it with the baby. Both of you will look forward to such traditional “holidays”. It is important that everyone likes them, that they do not turn into something forced.
- “Shake” intimate sphere
Variety in bed is a delicate issue. Before learning 1000 and 1 ways to surprise him, think about what it is for? And are you really ready for such a variety?
Surprises should be done very carefully. It is difficult to predict what will cause an ambiguous reaction in your man. Konechno, pozzhe vy distributed, no wecher budet isporchen. If you want to know about “novinku” and dogovorit. This is emotionally related to and by the local population.
Who will surprise whom more? When adding bright colors to everyday life, be guided by a sincere desire, and not someone else’s advice. Opinion on external words: in what do you say by “sweet” or “sweet”?