Not all dating ends in a happy ending, like in romantic movies. And not only the weaker sex is faced with betrayal and betrayal. It is generally accepted that men are much easier to relate to relationships. And it’s not so difficult for them to survive a breakup. Is it really?
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It turns out that everything is not so simple. According to NCB News, it takes a lot longer for men to get over their ex. The stronger sex is more vulnerable to shock events. The more painful the separation, the more time a man needs to recover.
You can endlessly feel sorry for yourself and hate her. Or you can pull yourself together, close this chapter of your life and move on. If you are ready to take decisive action, use the tips from our article.
Suffering cannot be forgotten or 16 ways to forget
- Admit you’re in pain
Many guys choose the tactic of denial. They are ready to shout to the whole world about how they do not care about this girl. Although deep down they know it’s a lie. And the worst thing is that they lie to themselves.
Denial won’t help you deal with your feelings. You can run from them, deny them, and “move on.” What will you end up with? You will drag all your baggage from the past into a relationship with a new girl. You will make the same mistakes. Because he didn’t understand himself in time, didn’t change his thinking, didn’t reassess his values.
And the negative feelings that you thought you suppressed will make themselves felt. Therefore, it is better to live this parting with taste once and recover from it than to continue walking with this stone on your courageous heart.
- forget about friendship
“Shall we remain friends?” – after parting, we often try to get rid of guilt and create the appearance of friendship and good relations. Is it worth it to go on about a girl and pretend that friendship with her brings you indescribable delight? Definitely not. Limit all contact with her. Don’t settle for friendship. It won’t lead to anything good.
- memory road
One way or another, but we all hit memories from time to time. We try to analyze, fantasize and idealize something. And some, in a fit of nostalgia, even decide to visit places that were memorable and meaningful for two.
Should not be doing that. The memories are still fresh, but the pain is too sharp. Avoid “your” cafes, parks and other establishments. No need to reopen the wounds with memories.
- Remove triggers
If you want to bounce back from your breakup with this girl, remove the triggers—anything that reminds you of her and causes pain. Don’t let these ghosts of the past invade your present. The sooner you get rid of them and stop clinging to memories, the faster your healing will go.
- Don’t follow her
Do some sort of detox. Unsubscribe from her on social networks, block the account if necessary. Don’t look at her photos, don’t read the comments below them, and don’t try to figure out who gave her the flowers she posted on Instagram yesterday at 11:34.
From “just stopping by for a minute” to “I think I spent the whole night stalking her on social media” is just one step away. Spying on an ex never leads to anything good. First, you will not be able to let her go and stop thinking about her for days. It’s quite difficult not to think for days about a person whose social media pages you visit three times a day. Secondly, you will absolutely mediocrely spend the precious time of your life.
- Persona non grata
Ask your friends not to mention your ex in conversations. It doesn’t matter who she’s with now. Where she lives and how she lives is no longer your concern. Let your friends know that you don’t intend to talk about it.
- Find a new love
Please note that this is not about taking advantage of another girl or taking revenge on her for your ex and the entire female gender. Meeting a new girl, feeling that you are ready for a new relationship and starting a romance is one thing. Trying to numb the pain by tricking an innocent girl into feeling like a fallback is another.
Music has a powerful force. It can both heal and crush you and your psycho-emotional state.
You probably had “general” songs. There are probably tracks in your playlist that are associated with her. With your thoughts about her, memories of dates and great times together. Do not listen to them on repeat and drive yourself into depression.
Delete those tracks. Find your new favorite artists. Or do otherwise – create new memories associated with this music. Listen to “your” tracks while playing sports, relaxing with friends. The main thing is to experience a surge of energy and strength.
- Don’t become a recluse
Many people after a difficult breakup prefer to spend their evenings alone. I do not want to catch the sympathetic looks of friends and acquaintances. Listen to advice and politely nod to “everything will be fine.” It’s easier to stop seeing friends, going to family reunions, and generally not interacting with people in any way.
You have the right to spend this time alone with yourself. But do not abuse seclusion. The abundance of free time is fertile ground for disturbing reflections. Spend more time with loved ones. Your life doesn’t end when you break up with your girlfriend.
Oh, those drunk calls to the former! Let’s do without this circus this time, okay? It still won’t change anything. And you will only feel worse. While she will build her life and occasionally remember you (just after your drunken calls), you will get bogged down in an ocean of regret, despair and self-loathing.
- Clear it all up once and for all
Your friends probably have a number of questions about your relationship. One way or another, but they will show curiosity. And you know it. Better clear things up once and for all.
Tell close friends how it really was. They will stop looking at you with annoying curiosity mixed with embarrassment and confusion. Perhaps they will share their own experience. In any case, you will feel better.
Recovering from a breakup with your girlfriend is never easy. And you have to put in the best effort. Start by occupying yourself and your thoughts with something other than self-pity and hatred for her.
“I don’t feel like doing anything.” Okay, give yourself time to suffer and degrade. And then pull yourself together and, as you were taught in childhood, do “through I don’t want to”.
- Forget about revenge
Clumsy attempts to make the person who hurt you jealous always leave a taste of disappointment. In an attempt to get back at your ex-girlfriend, you put the reins of control over you and your feelings in her hands. If the plan succeeds and she becomes jealous of you, you will feel gloating and joy. If it turns out that she does not care, you will feel like a complete idiot. An idiot who tries to assert himself at the expense of the girl he once loved.
- Dot all
It’s hard for you to forget her because your relationship hasn’t been put to the end. Everything happened somehow crumpled, and you did not have time to really talk like adults. Why did you break up? Who and what did not suit? Nothing is clear. And you continue to fill your head with unnecessary questions, over and over again scrolling through your head a film with frames of your relationship. Bathe in illusions and hope for a reunion. All you have to do is sit down and talk calmly. So that no one has any doubts – the relationship is over. Forever and ever.
- Spend your time alone productively
So we’re back to seclusion. But now let’s sketch out a plan of action and try to organize a productive and useful retreat for you.
Do you remember the first point? Live these emotions and put things in order in your head. Right now.
Now you don’t have to spend time with a girl. All twenty-four hours of the day are completely yours. It’s time to taste this life. If you have the opportunity, be sure to go on a trip – even if it is just a trip to another city. New acquaintances, vivid emotions and juicy memories – this is what you need now.
PS In order to forget an ex-girlfriend, you need to want it very much. First, you clearly decide for yourself that eternal suffering is not for you, then you cross off the items from our list one by one and voila – life is beautiful again. Take action!