How to restore a relationship with a person after a lie? Your relationship was just fabulous, you loved Him very much and still love him, but at some point you stumbled and began to deceive. Why did this happen? Why did you do it? And most importantly, how now to return everything back. Because your trust has been broken. Let’s try to understand all these questions.
Why do we cheat in relationships?
Let’s start with why the deception in your relationship happened at all. If you mean the reasons, then you can avoid a repetition in the future.
- Bad habit
For you, little lies are the norm. If you want to do so, the blowers and the drafts, you will have to pay attention to the details. No part of the party will do so in a way that is not difficult.
And here we are talking about cheating “on a grand scale.”
It is not necessary to understand the meaning of the word. And not everyone is ready to forgive.
- Scared to tell the truth
It may have something to do with your childhood. When you were severely punished for your mistakes and, even worse, deprived of love. It could have come from a father or mother, or any other significant adult. Because now you are lying, because you are afraid of losing the love of a person dear to you.
- avoiding conflict
In order not to quarrel with your loved one, you prefer to lie about small things. For example, your man asked you to fill up the car. And you forgot, and you will tell him that you didn’t have time to do it, because the boss hung a lot on you, having won a lot of money. We go the next day. No, since you are not to blame for the circumstances, the conflict will not happen.
- Are you in a relationship crisis?
And perhaps you have already made the decision to leave at some point, and therefore began to deceive. You don’t have the courage to speak up about your decision.
And then you were caught in a lie, and you realized that you didn’t want to leave the relationship, that you could eat everything somehow.
There are many more reasons why you can cheat, but most importantly, after all this, how to save?
What to do next?
And so, you have already made many unsuccessful attempts to renew the relationship, but your man is not ready to build a long-term alliance with you again. Although you feel that he loves you, or you want to believe it. What can be done in such a case?
How to restore the trust of a beloved man?
- Stop lying. Sovsem. Tell the most recent nonsense about yourself and your events for the day. Tell the truth more than necessary. But be crystal clear. And preferably for a long time.
- No blame your partner and don’t be defensive. He has the right to tell you about his feelings and that his deceit hurt him.
- Talk about your feelings. About being sorry. About why you did it. The fact that your relationship is important to you and you really want to keep it.
- Ask how you can regain your partner’s trust? And even if there is no answer, the man will know that you are ready to do something to renew your union.
- Don’t discount his feelings. No stoit says that all this is nonsense. Every person has the right to feel what he wants.
- Let the conflict be only between you. And that means that you should not ask friends or your parents to talk to your partner. You can work it out together. That is what it is like in that country, this budget is in the history, and it is not posted.
- Shut up. Sometimes you need to be in silence after all that has been said for both of you. Don’t pressure him or make excuses all the time.
And remember, no matter how hard it is, your partner is even harder now. After all, he trusted you and built a trusting relationship. And perhaps he also wants to establish a connection between you, but for this he needs time. More on this, below.
Give it time
No matter how difficult it is, you need to give time to both him and yourself. You are here, you are entering the new arguments, and you are here, you are here and there.
Yes, if there was a conflict between you and it was due to deceit, both are still to blame to some extent (just don’t blame him, if you want to make peace, you need to draw conclusions for yourself).
Perhaps in a relationship, he gave you little freedom, and you decided to get it by deception. No now you understand that this is not an option. Because if in a relationship, when something does not suit you, they talk, but do not deceive.
Therefore, even now you can continue to talk, and not hush up what happened between you. No prior to this it is not necessary to measure it. You can agree on the time that you give each other to think everything over, but with the condition that then you will definitely talk.
This is important so that the conflict between you does not end with an ellipsis. After all that you had to endure, it is important for you to end all this mutually (not necessarily with the consent of each other, the partner may want to leave, but so that both of you can speak out).
More about trust
Since now you need to open up to your partner to the maximum:
- You can no longer hide your phone or social networks
If your relationship is important to you, you will be honest. And that’s the only way to get it back. Because, this is not guaranteed, it is up to you to save money. But the fact that this is the only key is for sure.
- Set Joint Commitments
It should be something that will bind only you and will be fulfilled. Sunday dinner or scheduled meeting with friends. No must be fulfilled. There should not be any excuses that will be lies. It is not necessary to do this for the part.
Remember the past
In moments of crisis, it is very important to remember all the good things that united you. How and where did you meet, why did you choose each other from a million other people.
Recall your most vivid dates and immerse yourself in them. You can do all this if both of you understand that you want to save the relationship, but at first it is very difficult to do. You need to return to point A, where it all began.
What else can you remember:
- Favorite films
- Places in the city, which is called “washing”
- Joint goals and plans
- Jokes you could laugh at all night long
- Holidays when everyone was smiling and happy
- You can see joint photos and videos
The most important thing is to remember that there is still something more between yours, besides the abyss that Alzi is rich in. And then you will succeed. Nothing brings people together like plans for the future. Remember them or build new ones. That’s just cheating in your relationship should no longer be a place. Otherwise