Do you feel that your relationship is at risk of ending? Also, you think that they no longer have a future together and you don’t know how to revive the flame of love as a couple, don’t worry!
The good news is that you have not yet lost the most important thing: hope.
Well, now you are on the right track to solve your situation; Do not hesitate and keep reading!
Each couple is a world apart. They are all diverse as are those who make them up; but, there are guidelines that remain invariable in relationships no matter how different they are.
If you are determined not to give up and learn how to revive the flame of love as a couple, here are 7 tricks that will help you recover what you think was lost in your relationship.
#1: Why are we a couple?: positive inventory
The first thing you need is to make a count.
The history of your relationship can give you many clues to solve the current problem.
Go back in time and answer these simple questions:
How did you meet?
Recreate the details surrounding that moment:
- The first time they met
- The place
- who accompanied them
- The first words they exchanged
- The specific circumstance as clearly as possible
Close your eyes and relive those moments as if it were in the present tense.
Do you remember what you felt? Was it all a crush at first sight or did love grow unbridled afterwards?
Did you feel nervous when you saw it or with “butterflies” in your stomach?
How were the first experiences together?
Go back in time: do you remember the first kiss? Was it what you expected?
And the first time they made love? Recreate what you felt in those moments.
Were you very scared? And the? Surely, the subsequent experiences were better than those first times.
Perhaps you even have more than one funny anecdote of those moments when neither of you knew how much the other liked kisses or caresses.
Why did you decide to form a couple and be together?
There can be many reasons.
Even the circumstance that surrounded them may have influenced; that happens, for example, when a baby comes sooner than expected.
But, the decision to form a couple is always given by mutual feelings of love and affection towards that other with whom you want to share your world.
There are many things that you can count in your life as a couple with your boy.
The important thing is that this account becomes a positive inventory of the causes that led them to be together, of why they decided to become the couple they are today, of what they felt at that moment.
The next thing you should do is use all that to your advantage to return to that initial feeling and you will see that how to revive the flame of love as a couple will be easier than ever.
This count can be an exercise first for you and then for you to do with your child.
Thus, they will recreate together these initial experiences in which the feeling that unites them was awakened and they will be able to work on rescuing it.
#2: The art of communication: let’s talk frankly
Communication is the most powerful tool of human beings, it makes us have the ability to express, at all times, what we feel or think.
That is in theory, because in practice not everyone knows how to use this tool, since speaking is not always communicating.
Healthy communication as a couple is vital!
In a relationship, it is essential to communicate and, of course, do it correctly.
If from the beginning of the relationship you do not tell him how you feel, what you think about both of them, what happens to you at certain times, you are going the wrong way.
Don’t forget the following:
- He is not you, therefore he does not know what is going on in your head and your heart if you do not tell him.
- Women have certain powers of observation, and even intuition, that allow them to realize things without anyone telling them.
- The male mind works differently, of course, but that is not the point.
- No matter how observant or intuitive you are, you can’t know what your guy is feeling all the time if he doesn’t tell you, and vice versa.
- If what you want is to understand how to revive the flame of love as a couple, you need to sit down and talk with him.
- It is not about arguing or fighting, much less insulting or yelling at each other.
- The objective must be, above all, to understand each other and understand the other.
- Communicating what you feel, at the right time, can save you many future problems.
But, if the problem is already there, if you’ve already let things go, if you should have said it and you didn’t, then you have to stop and try to understand each other:
- express our feelings
- Let the other know what we think and not let them guess
- Tell him what we don’t like or bother
- Also know how to listen to what you have to tell us
#3: Learning to discuss and dialogue
If you follow the advice above, keep the following in mind.
To be able to communicate and be understood by the other, you have to learn how to do it.
If you are one of the very possessive, or you always like to have the last word, or above all you want to be right at all times, stop! This is not the way to recover your partner’s love.
If all the time you look for a culprit, or see betrayals and things wrong, stop again!!
Think back a bit and be calm. Breathe, relax and think things through.
Are you really always right? Is he always to blame?
Is it necessary that you always control everything? At your side are all disappointments and disappointments?
I think it shouldn’t be that way.
learn to give in
If you want to know how to revive the flame of love in your partner, if you want to recover what seems lost or about to be lost, the first thing you have to learn is to give in and leave space when you talk or argue with him.
It’s not that they don’t fight. It’s not about not arguing. All relationships have arguments and misunderstandings.
In all there are differences in criteria, whoever tells you the opposite lies blatantly.
The important thing is to learn to discuss and, more than that, to dialogue, to converse, and going back to what I told you before, to communicate, to listen to each other.
Do not put a NO in your mind before I explain something to you.
Do not censor what he says before he finishes expressing himself. Listen to him, show him that you know how to do it, and show him how.
You will see that with tenderness and patience they can smooth out the differences. It’s worth a try!
#4: Forgive and forget: keys to know how to revive the flame of love as a couple
If you want to be clear about how to revive the flame of love as a couple, you have to be in the greatest and most absolute willingness to forgive.
It’s not about just saying it: “I forgive you”, or letting go of things that hurt you, this is the biggest mistake!
Yes, because those things, those memories of moments or actions that hurt you, come back again and again.
It is as if you kept them in a drawer or trunk; you will know that they are hidden but that, at any moment, they can easily come to light.
This is what happens in couples’ arguments when they take out “dirty laundry in the sun”, and even the most insignificant details come out that, supposedly, had been left behind, had been forgiven.
How to prevent them from coming back, from remaining in the memory? Forgiving indeed!
The benefits of forgiving
You must learn, together with your boy, to forgive from the heart, and turn the page on what happened.
You must forget what hurt you, not because you are going to erase it from your memory, the memory will be there, but you will remove the painful part, the one that made you suffer.
That is the correct way to forget, pushing away sadness and pain.
If you manage to put aside the rancor and resentment (which serve no purpose other than hurting you over and over again), you will be able to forgive even what would seem most unforgivable.
Then you will have turned the page, and that trunk or drawer can be opened as many times as you want, since there will be nothing there.
I invite you to read the article published by scielo.org.bo, it will surely be of great help to you.
#5: Do not neglect personal appearance
Here’s another super important tip: if you don’t want to neglect your relationship, you can’t neglect yourself either.
At the beginning of any relationship, we try to impress the other.
Surely you wore your best dress to that dinner that invited you, or you spent hours in front of the mirror putting on makeup or combing your hair because you were going to meet him.
That happens to all of us.
But time and coexistence make our partner see us at all times of our day, and it is impossible to be impressive at all times!
It is not about being careless, it is normal that he has seen you disheveled when you wake up, messy after tidying up or cleaning the house, or sick and weak with the flu.
That’s what living as a couple is all about!
You will also have seen him in his worst facades, but that is also love.
Love him day by day
What cannot happen is that you neglect yourself for him because he is already with you, because you no longer have to conquer or impress him, who said that?
In the day to day is when you have to make the most effort to conquer it, again, every morning.
Surprise him with one of the following details:
- A new cut and hairstyle
- A new dress
- Dress up even if you’re not going anywhere, do it just for him, and make him notice!
- Use different ways of conquest, innovate, change the old ones that you have always used
- Take hold of everything you have at your fingertips and your favor.
If you are overweight, join a gym or do exercises at home to shape your figure a bit.
That your boy feels that you strive to please him, to like him, like the first days.
Encourage him to do the same, without humiliating or belittling him.
It is about conquering from affection, showing the will you have to fight for how to revive the flame of love as a couple.
So now you know, go for it!
#6: Spending time together
Modern life is very hectic, but you have to organize the agenda based on the two.
They have to spend time together, everything cannot be focused on work, school or children. Money is important, but you have to give time to love.
A couple relationship with time for both directly affects the satisfaction of each of the members and their interaction with society.
Check out the article published by researchgate.net so you understand how important it is to stay in a healthy relationship.
If they have many responsibilities to fulfill, they have to plan better.
Get organized a bit so you can share time together.
Take advantage of the indicated dates to have a reason to celebrate.
Don’t let birthdays or anniversaries pass you by.
Valentine’s Day must be magical, a little extra help to organize it, you can find it in the article How to spend an unforgettable Valentine’s Day with your partner Romantic tips!
But, don’t just stay there, because the dates indicated are very few times a year: make up an excuse to prepare a delicious dinner for him or invite him to take a bubble bath by candlelight.
It doesn’t have to be a special day, they all are; There doesn’t have to be a reason to share an ice cream or a walk in the park with your partner.
Plan something out of the daily routine even once a week: the visit to the most common place can become unforgettable if you enjoy it together.
#7: Renewing old patterns
If you apply all of the above, then this advice will also be useful to you.
Just as we renew the wardrobe, or the curtains, we must renew ourselves internally.
Grudges and resentments, as I already told you, are highly harmful if you want to know how to revive the flame of love as a couple.
Negative attitudes repeated over time are also.
All of that, just like clothes and shoes, can also be changed!
Dare to try new things in every way.
Change him, for example, the way you call him; enjoy using different nicknames each time and discover the result.
Check Funny nicknames to use in your relationship The best compilation! and it will give you extra data.
Investigate and change the roles you have always had in sexual relations, try new things that surprise him, show him that you are the woman he wants by his side.
You can start with something as simple as kisses.
How to revive the flame of love as a couple is about giving it a lot, but a lot of desire.
Hold on to the strength that what you feel for him gives you, fight for both and permanence as a couple, and if you feel that fire goes out: give him a little help so that it lights up with more force again with these last tips!
- Share the shower with your partner
- Leave him romantic news
- Bet on eye contact
- Sleep away from home from time to time to change the routine
- Don’t forget to take advantage of technology; surprise him with risqué messages or one or another sensual photo.
- Wear clothes that bring out your sensuality
- Exercise and eat healthy to look and feel good about yourself; In this way, your partner will see you differently and you will undoubtedly attract more than just their attention.