How to stop being jealous of a man? Causes of jealousy in women. Frankly, jealousy is only good in small doses. If a man is not the hero of a Brazilian series for housewives, he is unlikely to be ready for years to endure the daily removal of the brain. What to do if you are dating a pathological jealous woman? Or worse – what to do if you are that very jealous girl?
How to stop being jealous of a man? Causes of jealousy in women
Men can’t stand being restricted in some way, throw tantrums and rummage through their phone.
Not only girls know how to plot.
Sometimes guys want to play games too.
If a man, for one reason or another, does not get enough attention that he receives from a particular girl, he tries to arouse jealousy in her.
How do men do it?
We open the cards.
To begin with, any manipulation of human feelings is a dangerous game. You can’t act out in the open. As long as you are careful, the fish will take the bait. She wonders why you are not giving her (the fish) as much attention as before.
If the fish feels false and sees the shine of the metal hook, it simply turns around and waves its tail at you.
This applies to both men and women.
- Approach – distance
Men are very skillful in using this technique.
By the way, women also like to play push-pull. Who and when invented this game is unknown. We will now consider such tactics of behavior on the example of men.
First, he gives the girl attention, falls asleep with compliments and radiant smiles.
And then he starts ignoring her.
The victim is confused. She starts literally jumping out of her high-waisted pants, trying to figure out what she did wrong. She loses weight, changes her hair, improves her culinary and sexual skills and … thinks out. Where is he, with whom is he, how and how many times.
What can be compared to the richness of the imagination of a jealous girl?
Imagine that Stephen King, Nicholas Sparks and Pierre Woodman team up and create a horror-melodrama-hardcore movie.
- There are many other fish in the sea
When a man is alone with his lady, all his eloquence is spent solely on her.
But as soon as other girls appear nearby, the behavior of the prince immediately changes.
He deliberately arouses the jealousy of his girlfriend by flirting with other attractive persons. No vulgarity, no excesses. Secular communication, that’s all.
Don’t dig in.
Girls are from Venus, men are from Mars, and stuff like that.
And we still steal receivers from each other.
How to make your partner jealous?
Start laughing at the jokes of the other girl/boy.
We all want to appear funny and witty. Especially next to those who are not indifferent to us.
And when this most indifferent person starts laughing at the stupid jokes of some busty girl, it infuriates.
I wonder if he’s really funny or he just wants to stare at her?
The crown move is when he defiantly ignores the jokes of a girl in whom he wants to arouse jealousy.
- light touch
Touch your hand, put your hand on your back, etc. Harmless tactile contact. Brave enough to provoke jealousy, harmless enough to answer all accusations with an angelic smile.
A man will not go beyond what is permitted. And he will act only when the gaze of the jealous woman is fixed on him.
- Talk about other girls
He can specifically praise his girlfriends/acquaintances/colleagues and talk about how funny, interesting, cool, etc. they are.
What is it for?
To make the girl go crazy with jealousy.
Some men do this in order to “motivate” a woman to improve herself – both external and internal.
How to make an already jealous girl go crazy?
Ignore her calls and messages on social networks, and at this time actively interact with other girls.
Post photos from a wild party full of beautiful girls. Actively communicate with them in the comments, joke and flirt.
Even the most calm and independent girl will be enraged by this.
- Photos with other girls
Let’s expand on the previous point in more detail.
To make a girl jealous, he will post photos of him in the company of other girls.
Funny “stories” and colorful photos full of beauties.
And all this despite the fact that he refuses to upload photos with his girlfriend, coming up with various excuses.
- Without you, without you…
He will talk in colors about how much fun he had last night. It is not even necessary to mention other girls here.
Some ladies are very hurt if a boyfriend manages to enjoy life outside the company of his beloved.
How dare he!
- Mysterious messages
If a guy beams at the screen of his smartphone when he reads a message, but refuses to say who wrote to him, what reaction will the girl have?
To put it mildly, negative.
Who is it that amuses you so much, huh?!
- Ignore in the company
When a guy and a girl appear in a company, he seems to forget about his missus. Chat with anyone but her. As if he does not notice how the girl literally boils with anger.
But it is not.
In fact, that is exactly what he was looking for.
All of the above are psychological manipulations used by both girls and boys.
Here it is important to remember the following:
- Everything should be in moderation. If you get too carried away with such games, there is a high risk that the relationship will fall apart. You will simply be sent to hell, and you yourself will find yourself in the “ignore”.
- There is always a line that should not be crossed, because this is fraught with consequences.
Why do guys and girls intentionally make each other jealous? Why is it all? Don’t they want a normal, healthy relationship?
I want to.
But a child lives in each of us throughout our life. Which very quickly begins to get bored with monotony.
That is why there have been so many relationship coaches and relationship gurus who have been divorced lately, who advise to give a partner a shake-up from time to time – to distance, surprise and even shock.
Like, without this, your other half will relax, stop trying for you, and love will begin to fade.
Well, that makes a lot of sense.
The main thing is not to overdo it and not destroy the relationship with your own hands.
Mars and Venus
We started our article by talking about female jealousy. Favorite topic of various jokes, memes, sitcoms, stand-up performances, etc.
We also talked about the fact that while some men go crazy from this very jealousy, others, on the contrary, try to cause it in all possible ways.
The topic is quite extensive, it’s time to write a dissertation.
But let’s talk about men.
More specifically, what is the difference between male and female jealousy.
This feeling has no age. Both children and adults experience it.
Jealousy has no gender. Both men and women, feeling a pang of jealousy, make scandals, say and do various ugly things, after which they become ashamed.
We are jealous of our other half not only for sexually attractive members of the opposite sex. But also to friends, parents and even hobbies.
Feeling jealous is normal. Exactly until this green monster absorbs you completely.
Let’s turn to science. Researchers David Frederick of Chapman University and Melissa Thales of the University of California, Los Angeles conducted a study trying to confirm the long-standing idea that men are more likely to experience sexual jealousy (whether or not there was an emotional connection) and women are more likely to experience emotional jealousy. (regardless of whether sex was involved or not).
The study was successful.
Similar studies have been carried out before. But the test groups were relatively small, including exclusively heterosexuals.
David and Melissa, on the other hand, approached the matter with soul – 64,000 people participated in their study. Among them were heterosexuals, homosexuals and bisexuals (both sexes) aged from eighteen to sixty-five years.
They asked the subjects the question: “Which would upset you more – if your partner slept with someone without feeling feelings, or fell in love, but did not sleep?”
54% of heterosexual men answered that the fact of physical infidelity would upset them the most.
Only 35% of heterosexual women, 32% of gays, 34% of lesbians, 30% of bisexual men and 27% of bisexual women agreed with them.
To explain such a large difference in views, the researchers turned to evolution. Before DNA analysis was invented, a man could not be sure that the child he was raising was really born from him.
Raising a child is a huge responsibility. Not every man is able to devote himself entirely to someone else’s son or daughter.
Now it becomes clear why the fact of physical infidelity for men is much more terrible than the romantic feelings of a partner for another.
Women who have cheated on their partners and concealed this fact, in turn, are afraid of losing a man and being left with a child in their arms.
Now back to heterosexual women. Many women answer the question “Could you forgive infidelity?” answer in the negative. Or they say the following: “Only if it was just sex, without feelings.” What is the reason for this approach?
If a man does not feel emotional attachment to a woman, it is likely that he will (sooner or later) leave her. This is how naive wives and no less naive mistresses calm themselves. If a man feels for a woman something more than just sexual attraction, most likely he will go to her already, leaving the other.
Evolution is, of course, great. It can literally explain everything. But Frederic and Thales decided to dig a little deeper.
What kind of man can be called “real”? What is the definition of masculinity and brutality?
A “real man” is required to have a pumped-up skill of sexual prowess. And while his woman is happy with everything and wriggles under him, crumpling the sheets, everything seems to be fine. But what if it suddenly turns out that she has someone on the side? It turns out that a man cannot satisfy his partner, i.e. fails to fulfill its responsibilities. Too strong a blow to the fragile male ego.
Now consider the concept of a “real woman.” What is she, this “real” and “ideal” life partner of yours? Affectionate, gentle, caring and – attention! – emotional.
It is much easier for a woman to survive the fact that her partner slept with another. “Out of stupidity”, “drunk”, etc. But to find out that a beloved man fell in love with another, for many girls is tantamount to a disaster.
Be that as it may, this study does not mean at all that men cannot be upset by the fact that their lady of the heart is breathing unevenly towards another, and women are ready to give everyone carte blanche for physical infidelity.
Men and women really think and feel differently.
However, they are from the same planet.
If jealousy poisons the lives of both partners, it is necessary to start a fight with it. From all fronts and as soon as possible.
If you are dating a jealous girl:
- Don’t play on her feelings. Jealousy in your relationship is more than enough.
- Do not let her violate your personal boundaries, but do not evade harmless questions – it is really important for her to know where you have been and with whom. If you don’t tell her yourself, she’ll figure it out for you. And you won’t like the result.
- Jealous girls are often extremely insecure. Avoid hurtful jokes and jokes. It won’t do her or your peace of mind.
- She needs to feel special. Talk to her about it as often as possible.
If you are that jealous girl
- Don’t make a man the center of your universe. Take care of yourself, your life and leisure. You must have solid ground under your feet – your favorite work, hobbies, your own circle of friends.
- Work out your complexes. Get rid of the resentment and psychological trauma that your previous relationship inflicted on you.
- Do not violate your partner’s personal boundaries. Don’t force him to be with you 24/7. Don’t give him ultimatums. This is incredibly annoying.
How to stop being jealous of a man? Causes of jealousy in women?