Each of us has experienced such a feeling as jealousy. Some people get it 1-2 times in their lives, others experience it all the time. Let’s see why it occurs and what to do if you are jealous of a guy for a girlfriend.
Why does a guy get jealous of a girlfriend
Photo by JD Mason on Unsplash
A woman by her nature is the owner. If we fell in love with a man, then we strive to ensure that he completely belongs only to us. Why should we let him go on barbecues with friends. And then there’s the conversation with a friend.
Anxiety is exacerbated by the age-old question of whether there can be friendship between a man and a woman. This is an eternal discussion to which it is impossible to give an unequivocal answer. Surely you have seen that a man in life carries friendship with a friend of a school or institute. This, of course, is a rare fact, but it has a place to be.
Perhaps you are not confident enough in yourself. You have low self-esteem. You look at the world pessimistically. In every girl you see your rival. You have suspicions about the fidelity of the guy.
Most often, this problem has roots in childhood. You had to prove that you were worthy of love. You were not loved just like that, for what you are. In the end, you adopted a similar model to yourself. There is a deep thought in you that danger is all around, love must be earned, you are not good enough for love.
Situation when jealousy has no reason
There are several good reasons that are evidence that you have no reason to worry:
- Парень сам познакомил тебя с подругой. It is not necessary to understand, it is distributed, it is not in the room, it is there that the doctor is, it is not the case.
- This woman has her man.
- There are quite a few people who know that a guy and a girlfriend have been friends for many years.
- A guy has known his girlfriend longer than he has known you.
- The friendship of a guy with a girlfriend is based on the same job.
- The guy is not in friendly relations with the girl, but in friendship.
Situation when jealousy is justified
If you want to know how to do it:
- The guy spends a lot of time with his girlfriend. They are often alone.
- The guy during your questions evades answers, does not tell about the meeting, pretends that he hardly meets his girlfriend.
Jealousy: the true source and deliverance
- The friendship between a guy and his girlfriend began somehow suddenly and too actively. To that end it is not necessary to say that it is not possible to have a fire. Moreover, the guy talks about his girlfriend with some enthusiasm.
How to stop jealous boyfriend to girlfriend
Let’s see what to do if you are jealous of a guy to a girlfriend.
- Understand the situation.
until you understand the exact situation. Don’t twist. Most likely, the romance of a guy with his girlfriend is only in your head. Find out if you really have reasons for jealousy.
Take a closer look at their relationship, note the presence of oddities between a guy and a girlfriend. See if the young man shows the same signs to her as to you at the very beginning of your relationship.
Think that for some reason the guy chose you, and did not begin to build a relationship with his girlfriend. Remember what words he says to you, compliments, how he confesses his love. Do not evaluate yourself critically, do not compare yourself with other girls.
- Let it go.
If a guy wants to change, he will do it, your worries, scandals, tantrums will not help, but only utityuat. And, on the contrary, if he values \u200b\u200bhis relationship with you, then jealousy is unfounded.
If you are harassed, you will turn into a neurotic with a bunch of somatic diseases. And neither you nor your boyfriend needs it. Jealousy will lead to uncontrollable, impulsive behavior that leads to many terrible acts. Don’t let this happen to you.
- Don’t make the guy the center of the universe.
Take care of yourself, find a hobby that will distract you from the situation. Work on improving your self-esteem. Consider if you are EMOrationally dependent on the guy. This is a pathological situation. It requires an immediate solution.
Photo author Yan Krukov: Pexels
Start taking care of yourself, take up some kind of sport, sign up for yoga, a foreign language course, start dancing, read books, go to the movies with your friends. You must have a private life. If you are interesting for yourself, then the guy will begin to show increased attention to you.
Focus on your appearance. Go to the hairdresser. Feel beautiful. This feeling is intuitively transmitted to men. Surround yourself with fans. Then the guy will be in good shape. He will have no time to pay attention to other girls. He will understand that you are in demand.
- Talk to a guy.
Discuss your concerns directly with your boyfriend. Speak in a calm environment, take responsibility for your emotions. At the moment it is suggested to say “you-messages” in conversation: “you annoy me”.
Speak from an “I” position, express your feelings. Take responsibility for yourself: “I get upset when I see your attentions to other girls.” When talking, focus on your feelings, and not on the actions of the guy.
It is possible that the guy and does not know what passions are raging inside you. He considers his meetings with his girlfriend harmless. Perhaps they mean nothing to him, and he will offer you different ways to solve this issue.
- Analyze the situation.
Try to give yourself an honest answer to the question: “Why is a guy friends with a girl?”. Maybe he gets from this relationship what you do not give him. Look at your communication format, how you meet his needs.
It is important for every man to be respected, thanked, admired, proud of. Rate how often you compliment a guy. Do not make him scandals, do not forbid meetings with a friend.
Men don’t like ultimatums. Better take care of developing your relationship. Make sure that the guy sees how lucky he is with you, so that he takes care of your relationship, not wanting to break up with you. Appreciated you.
Do everything to get rid of the guy’s jealousy for his girlfriend. You thus live in a state of eternal stress, spending your energy on scandals and trying to resolve the issue through external resources.
Direct internal forces to work on yourself: self-development, hobbies, studies, professional activities. In this case, the price is more than one person and the other two are on the windproof side.