How to stop pretending you don’t notice cheating? For some, betrayal is a tragedy, the end of life. Drugs that are proselytized are the same, and the heat is given away, and that is not the case. They endure it, eat chocolate, and live as usual. But in this denial of what happened, many problems are hidden, and therefore we figure out how to stop pretending that you do not notice the changes.
Acceptance of treason
It’s worth making a reservation right away – there’s nothing good in pretending that you don’t notice betrayals, enduring them, and living on, as if nothing had happened.
You drive yourself into a corner, lose confidence in yourself, and turn into a kind of yourself. To endure deceit requires tremendous inner strength and powerful motivation.
But you can use your powers for something else, like growing, building a business, and building deep relationships with the people you love and who love you.
Then, perhaps, some internal motives make you endure deception from a loved one? If you want to do this, you can do this without having to worry about it:
- You believe that he cheats by accident.
- You think this is the last time.
- I am sure that if you are being cheated on, then it is your fault.
- You do not want to see the obvious, to believe in what is happening.
- Do you want to avoid a situation where someone will say that you are weak, and have not managed to save your family?
- You think everyone is like that.
- You do not believe that you can live alone or find true love.
- I just gave up and in my own eyes turned into a victim. And you do not want to change this status.
Perhaps when you read all this and think about someone who has been cheated on, these reasons cause an internal protest in you, a lack of understanding of why a woman does not fight them.
At the same time, when you are cheated on, you feel lost and weak, you try to close your eyes to deceit.
So how do you stop pretending not to notice the betrayal?
Accept the facts
The fact that a guy, a husband is cheating on you, can be found out by gossip or well-founded facts. You hear the aroma of unfamiliar perfumes he brought with him. You find traces of someone else’s lipstick. On stays late in the evenings, and leaves home on weekends.
What to do if you find out about your husband’s infidelity?
But at the same time, you confidently convince yourself that the scent of perfume came from a colleague, and the lipstick on the shirt was left by a passerby who was pushed by someone. In the evenings and on weekends he works to avoid being fired and to earn more money.
Thus, you deny the facts, you find yourself in some reality parallel to them. A similar phenomenon in psychology is called derealization. It is based on the substitution of reality under the influence of a depressed state, disappointment, and apathy.
What to believe? Tome, is that what you see in reality?
In case you suspect fraud, it is better to believe the facts. Therefore, to get out of the situation of betrayal, you need to accept them. This is hard to do, but it is the first step on the path to breaking free from the fetters of deceit.
How to accept the facts:
- Write down what you see. I heard the scent of perfume, write it down in your diary. You can even go to the store for fun and check if you are right by guessing their name. Recording is hard, but it gives a connection with reality.
- Trust your intuition. She is the first to go to the fight against lies. In the future, the consciousness and beliefs of the husband are connected. You will need to know that you are in the room, and you will not find it.
- Eliminate EMO rational evaluation, leave only the skeleton of events. It may look disgusting, but you can see what happened for what it is.
- Discuss the problem with someone close or a psychologist. Let them ask you questions, inspire you, give you energy.
Now that you see and understand what is happening, there is a risk of wanting to shut down and redeem even more. So you are calmer and more comfortable.
Of course, the rare situations when you resurface will create pain and anxiety. No weed the better you hide, the safer you will be. At least that’s how it seems.
An attempt to hide from problems leads to the fact that you give up on yourself, stop believing in yourself, dov. No to that, you are on a man and in the morning. After all, if you look at reality, you run the risk of seeing yourself as a weak person, afraid of facts, who has turned into a shadow of the ideal that you once wanted to be.
To resolve the situation, and stop pretending that you do not notice the Husband’s betrayals, you need to learn to accept, respect and love yourself.
Believe me, you are a worthy person. There will still be love and happiness in your life. There will be someone you can trust.
Now you are facing change. It didn’t happen because you’re bad, ugly, or a failure. It just happened. Let go of the situation and start believing in yourself.
- If someone gossips about you, let them gossip. These are their problems. Be above it.
- Maintaining a family is not just a wife’s business. The role of the husband is also important in it. If it is ignored, it is not possible to be aware of it.
- No wine you see in it. If suddenly you did something wrong, the man could well say about it, and not go into the arms of another well.
- It doesn’t matter how everyone else is, the main thing is how you are. There is no need to accept and endure betrayal, If you are not satisfied with this approach to life and if you strive for Trust and respect in the family.
The purpose of self-acceptance is to create such a shell in which for every reason for betrayal you will find a logical counterargument protecting you. So you learn to accept yourself and at the same time not blame anyone for what happened.
No, where you are doing it and it is not necessary. You see yourself, you understand that you can no longer and do not want to endure deception. At this moment it is not necessary to understand the French language.
Agree that hearing confirmation from your beloved husband that he no longer loves you is scary. It’s one thing to suspect, to manipulate the facts in your head. Another is to hear a specific answer that confirms the suspicions.
Therefore, the next step toward recognizing treason is to gain inner courage. If this is not the case, you will have to live in the area
Courage will allow you to do the following:
- Talk to your husband. Listen to him regardless of whether he is lying or telling the truth. Tell him in his eyes that you know everything. Hear his opinion.
- Realize that the past as it was is no more. There is a chance that your loved one will stop cheating and you will live happily ever after. There is also a chance that you will leave and in time, who knows, you can trust the other person and love him.
- Courage will allow you to leave your partner if he confesses his feelings for another woman and they don’t want to talk back.
- Becoming brave at least for a while, you will be able to confirm to friends, and relatives that your relationship is destroyed. And in this case, it is not even necessary to explain why. The reason is your own business.
In addition, courage is needed to simply live on, enjoy children, warmth, the sun, the opportunity to enjoy walking, and meeting new people.
On paper, these steps seem light and weightless. No in real terms it is necessary. However, it is risky to do so, and this is granted to the owner of the room and it is possible to do so.