How to tell a man about breaking up correctly – advice from a psychologist? It’s hard to say no to people. We are afraid of offending them, causing them inconvenience, we do not want to look bad in their eyes. It can be even more difficult to refuse a man, because by showing his sympathy, on seems to oblige us to give him something.
These are just our thoughts and beliefs, incorrect attitudes. Everyone wants to be happy, so being close to a person Only Because it seems to us that we owe Him is wrong. The current is present in the finding of harmony in relations with “your” companion.
What are the reasons for rejection?
Before you know what exactly to say to a man so that he steps aside; It is distributed in the factors, which is provided for the distribution and the lack of communication with the small number of people.
- The man is boring.
So you started dating, and everything seems to be calm and smooth. He is tactful and courteous. However, you are bored with him, you want more emotions and drive. There is no need to rush into a breakup. Perhaps, in a serious relationship, stability and harmony are just needed.
- The man is too persistent.
Women love persistent men. However, if his persistence borders on obsession, this can push a woman away.
- The man is not interested in you.
You are courted by a man who does not arouse your interest at all. You don’t want to spend time with him. Your hobbies are different and you have nothing to talk about with him.
- The man is rough.
The behavior of a man who pushes you away is unlikely to change. If at the beginning of the relationship he is rude, then it will only get worse. In this case, it is uncomfortable in the company, this is the place where the position is.
- The man acted badly.
When a man’s act brought you resentment and pain, and conversations lead to nothing, you may want to leave, even if your relationship lasts a long time.
Despite the reasons that led to the distance, you should think carefully about the correctness of the decision. You must clearly understand that you do not want to see him next to you anymore. If in doubt, it might be worth giving another chance.
Choosing a setting for parting
If you nevertheless decided to tell a man that you need his company more, it is better to choose a place where you will report about it. If you talk about parting with a raid, he may not take the words seriously. Your task is to clearly explain your opponent’s position.
For such a conversation, it is better to choose a crowded place: you do not know the reaction of a person. In a public place, a man is unlikely to show aggression or start yelling at you loudly. It is also unlikely that he will beg you to stay.
With all this, the situation in the chosen place should be calm, and conducive to a measured conversation. A nightclub or cafe where music plays loudly is not the best place for such conversations.
How to have a conversation?
- Speak confidently and clearly. A trembling, uncertain voice will not allow a man to believe in the firmness of your decision.
5 practice, so that you are aware of the situation and not the situation
- Not blame and not manipulative. Emotionality can only interfere with an adequate conversation.
- Don’t use pity. For a man, pity is unbearable and can cause aggression.
- Don’t fall for his manipulation. He will try to keep you with them, but if you have made a decision, be firm in him.
- Не оправдывайся. Not to be heard in those glorious wines.
- In the case of aggressive behavior of a man, do not enter into a skirmish with him, do not appeal to man’s dignity. Ignore him and leave the meeting place.
How to tell a man that he is not needed (specific phrases)?
To inform a man about a breakup, it is worth considering not only the meeting place and intonation but also other details of the meeting. You don’t have to wear your best outfit. Of course, if you do not want to show the man so that he can see who he has lost.
Let’s think about the best way to tell a man about a breakup. Let’s take a look at commonly used phrases:
- “You are too nice. I thought you deserve better.”
A very common phrase used in those cases is when you are not interested in a man but are afraid to speak directly about your feelings. Moreover, men understand that she does not mean at all that he is really “worthy”. For them, this phrase is even more offensive than sincere.
- “Pričina not in Tebe”.
A rather vague phrase that does not carry any semantic load. It is perceived rather as an attempt to avoid specifics. It would be better to tactfully explain the reason because then the man will see sincerity and openness.
- “You will find the one and you will be happy.”
Of course, this phrase can be used. No by the fact in the minute, you should know that it’s not worth it. He is hurt and uncomfortable. It would be better to say: “We will definitely both meet people who will make us happy.”
- “You’re so wonderful, but you’re not right for me.”
This is a slightly absurd phrase because if he is so wonderful, then why don’t you want to be with him. It would be better to construct a phrase as follows: “I am impressed by your qualities such as …, but I lack …”.
- “You don’t deserve me”, “I deserve better”.
Not where you are. Parting should be as environmentally friendly as possible: words should not hurt and humiliate. It is not necessary and it is necessary to be able to do so.
- “I decided to break up with you because I met you better.”
Even though the conversation should be built on sincerity and openness, however, you can tell the truth in more tactful ways. “It so happened that I met a man whom I fell in love with. I can’t do anything with my feelings, ”it’s better to build a phrase like that.
- “We are different people”.
Just the difference in outlook on life, in hobbies, does not allow people to be together. Just because of the frequency of using this phrase, people began to perceive it as an excuse to justify themselves.
So that the opponent does not think that you are making excuses, it is worth saying: “We look at life differently, our views on the future are different”, and “It is difficult for us to find common ground, common interests.”
Examples of phrases that can be used to break up with a man:
“The time spent with you is valuable to me. I am grateful for everything you have given me. However, after thinking for a long time, I decided to leave. The reason is that I do not like your behavior (attitude, act). I am not ready to build relationships in this way.
“I respect you and your wishes, but I decided that we should leave. Yes, there are two columns, no one at that moment has no interest in them. This does not mean that you are bad, or that I am bad. This only shows that we are not suitable for each other, and we should try our luck separately. I believe that we will find our soul mates.”
It is worth building on respect and gratitude, despite all the negative things that happened between you. The man tried his best to be the best for you. And whatever the experience, it is, in any case, useful and valuable.
When the interlocutor feels a worthy attitude, despite the decision to leave, after a while he will come to terms with the breakup, and pleasant memories will remain of you because the most important thing in parting is to remain worthy people.
If a man does not want to part, pressthreatenens, and shows aggression, a peaceful separation is unlikely to be easy. Thus, on tries to return you by any means and it seems to him that such a method is acceptable.
In this case, you should protect yourself from communicating with him. Do not try to remain friends with such a person, ignore, do not return calls, and avoid conversations. In concrete terms, for the interested parties, no budget is available for all of this.
Having decided to part, Be decisive, Confident, and at the same time respect the person with whom your life has connected you. Every person who comes to us is a treasure and a storehouse of experience and lessons. Therefore, only gratitude and reverence should remain memories of each other.