How to understand a cheating husband by behavior and that a man regrets her? Cheating is always painful, no matter how long and strong your relationship has been. Her very fact calls into question everything that was between you. And if you have a 10-year marriage behind you, we houses think about tst
Psychologically, it is not necessary to understand the subject. Psychologically, it is not necessary to understand the subject.
Betrayal increases the likelihood of risky behavior. Those who try to survive a mental knockout eat junk food or refuse to eat at all, torture themselves on treadmills or stay on the couch for weeks, do not sleep, abuse alcohol, and tend to thoughtlessly enter into intimate relationships with the first they meet.
On the one hand, you still love your partner, and on the other hand, you suffer from resentment, hatred and guilt. I just want to erase everything from my memory. No, unfortunately, this is not possible, and the decision will still have to be made. Advice not help you can see in the tunnel.
Why did he cheat on you?
This is the first question a woman asks herself when she finds herself in a similar situation. What did I do wrong? What did he miss in our relationship? Is this what you’re about to do?
Well-wishers will say that it was necessary to refer less to a sore head, because any man has a limit. But intimacy is not the cornerstone. According to a survey conducted by the online dating service Parship, 25% of men in a serious relationship cheat. Women go to the left less often – in 13% of cases.
7 common causes of male infidelity:
- lack of thrills, the desire to taste the “forbidden fruit”;
- prolonged lack of intimacy and physical contact between partners;
- bringing to life certain scenarios that he cannot share with you;
- he does not feel needed and loved;
- he runs away from relationship problems;
- there are too many of you, you stifle him with your presence and control, and he wants freedom;
- he fell in love with another woman.
None of these reasons justifies a traitor. No pronouncements are made on this subject and they are allowed to do so. Sometimes it is enough to know the reason to make it a little easier.
Probably, at the beginning of the relationship, you did not tear yourself away from each other: it seemed that this feeling was forever and the routine never never never happened to you. No our everyday life is quite calm and boring. Office everyday life from 9 to 5 does not contribute to the production of adrenaline, and new experiences are needed.
Stress, deadlines, children, financial difficulties… All these are the enemies of a favorable atmosphere in the family. I want to run away to where it is easier, where they are waiting for you, and they do not demand anything in return. Often betrayal occurs during pregnancy or in the first years after childbirth. The child becomes the center of the Universe and the needs of the offspring come to the fore, and not yours. You fed, cleaned, washed, put to bed, fed again, and by the evening you look like a brownie Kuzya. You don’t want to be dragged into bed.
How to forgive betrayal? Self psychotherapy
For a man, intimacy is an outlet, a means to relieve tension. On the other hand, it is possible to understand the meaning of the word. Women, on the other hand, need an emotional connection, a special mood, the absence of interference, the understanding that she is beautiful. We have a different attitude towards marital debt. And an affair on the side may mean nothing to your partner. In simple words:
- men often make love to relax;
- women make love when they are relaxed.
Leave or stay
The saddest thing about betrayal is that you decide how you will live on, and not the hero of the occasion. It’s you who has to scrape self-esteem off the floor, shove suffering deeper inside yourself and think about things like Zet. In addition, you are accompanied by Vietnamese flashbacks all the time, how he had fun with a rival. Is it worth keeping a family? Need to figure it out better. Start with the right questions to ask yourself:
- Did it only happen once?
- Or did he hide an old romance from you?
- Does another woman mean anything to him?
It is important that your man really regrets his mistake and does not risk repeating it. In general, it cannot be said that after the betrayal in the continuation of the relationship there is no point. Sometimes you have to almost lose a person to understand how dear he is to you.
Unfortunately, a study by Kayla Knopp and her colleagues at the University of Denver found that few people stop at one-time cheating. Knopp followed 484 volunteers for five years. She wanted to find out what the chance of a relapse was.
The results of the experiment were disappointing. The traitors again went to the left 3.7 times more often than those for whom it was the first time. If you’re planning to forgive your man, think carefully about the risks.
The litmus test should be your ability to forget about betrayal, get it out of your head, never remember it and not tease your partner, and then his sincere regret about what happened.
If he had a constant lover, and he practically got hlen a second @ He is scared that he will lose such a comfortable you or your home and children, reputation, support from relatives. It’s not about love.
If you tell them that and what you want to do with the part, let them know:
- What does this relationship mean to him?
- How did it start?
- Does he feel remorse?
- What did he miss in your relationship?
- What did the other woman give him?
- Does he want to leave or save the family?
The point is not to find out as many greasy details as possible and finally go head over heels, but to make sure that he takes your pain seriously.
How to survive betrayal?
Go to Google Statistic, this is the most popular. The answer to it will be simple: just like eating an elephant – piece by piece. Cheating is a serious blow to self-esteem. And to stop tormenting yourself with questions, why didn’t you notice this earlier, and can you trust me. A lot of time.
You will come across the fact that even having “worked through” the problem, you will periodically return to it and suffer. This is fine. Leave stories where the heroine wakes up on a beautiful morning with complete amnesia to cinematic melodramas.
Whether you decide to forgive the cheater or slam the door for good, here are the instructions for surviving:
- next to the valley is a person to whom you care and who is not watered to “gaslight” you – modules, psycho, p20
- do what you have the strength to do, but take care of yourself. If you understand that in the near future you can’t get off the couch, replace fast food with healthy food, straluls
- what seems to you now the end of the world is an ordinary situation from which you need to draw conclusions and move on
