There are a few red flags to look out for when dating, even though you always mean well at first and things work out.
It is important to keep in mind that not every time it is something satisfactory and, in reality, that person may not be the one. It could even happen that you meet a toxic person who can put you at risk and you do not know it.
Taking into account that these people usually present themselves in a friendly way, it is not very easy to know that they can be harmful to us; therefore, it is very important to identify these warning signs that you should consider as soon as you start a new relationship.
In this article, I have decided to tell you a little about it. In addition, you can complement with the article «99 questions to get to know my boyfriend better» to find out who you’re really with.
Early signs when you’re dating
Keep in mind that the actions that alert us to abusive or obsessive behavior on the part of someone do not happen overnight.
Normally there is a period of time in which these people show their harmful side. So the faster you detect this, the better for you to act at the right time.
This is what every woman should know about her partner when they start dating
compulsive calls
It is good that in the midst of falling in love we want to talk a lot with that person, to know how they are and what they have done during the day.
But, since there is a limit to everything, it is good that you know when that person is going overboard with the phone.
An example of this is that they call you at inappropriate times when you are engaged in private activities such as resting.
This is one of the alerts that you must identify when you go out with someone!
subtle manipulation
When you start to engage in something with someone and you notice that that person tries to have a certain domain in everything they do, turn on the alert!
This, without a doubt, is a clear indication of a tendency to manipulation that can increase over time.
This behavior can be seen in their eagerness to influence, at first, the decisions concerning the relationship, but, the further the bond progresses, this manipulation could increase and manifest itself more clearly.
An example of this, at the beginning, can be the fact of capriciously changing the romantic plans that you had without any explanation.
In another case, it could happen that he tries to make you give up some date you had so that you stay with him for no apparent reason.
In either case, stay alert, especially when you’re just starting out with that person.
hateful comparisons
Have you ever been compared to someone or questioned what you do compared to others? If so, surely that moment was not very comfortable for you and perhaps you felt bad.
Now, imagine that person you are starting to date compares to you or questions how you do things. That should not be a nice feeling, much less if you are just starting the relationship.
For this reason, it is considered one of the alerts that you should identify when you go out with someone, because it is a toxic action that can get worse over time.
So it is best to detect it in time and try to solve the matter or make decisions about it.
He argues with you for trivial things
Discussions as a couple can be good and bad, it all depends on how they happen and on what terms.
However, when that person with whom you are just starting something begins to claim you for minor matters, be careful.
Usually, when we are barely in the honeys of love, we are more tolerant and there are not so many discussions. Therefore, it is unusual for someone to call you out on trivial matters so soon.
Just imagine what it would be like when you actually argue about something serious, it’s probably not the best experience.
So get your batteries! healthy couple communication is always very important.
Medium signs when you start dating someone
This kind of alert occurs on occasions when you missed early warnings or when that person had not yet shown signs of risk.
1. He calls you names or calls you in ways that you don’t like.
Be very careful with this point because it is a very clear warning signal since it goes against the respect that should be had.
There is no reason why you should put up with that person calling you in ways you don’t like. It’s one thing for him to call you sweet or funny, but for you to feel comfortable with it and agree.
Another very different matter is that he tells you things with bad intentions, which you should not tolerate.
2. Ridicules you, especially in public
Another of the alerts that you should identify when you go out with someone is the fact that they ridicule you.
It is not pleasant at all that you are with that person and, suddenly, they say something about you in front of other people making you look bad.
Your partner is supposed to be there to support you at all times and not to be some kind of enemy. Also, you can’t let anyone put you down, no matter how they relate to you.
3. He is jealous of you and mistrusts you
While jealousy can happen at any point in a relationship and is somewhat normal, there are a few things to keep in mind.
The fact that he distrusts you without reason is already a warning that you cannot ignore, even if Your boyfriend is jealous you should pay attention.
You can also do uncomfortable questions constantly, looking for you to fall into their games of mistrust.
In more extreme cases, his jealousy can overflow to the point that he can’t stand you getting involved with other guys. Things like this you should identify as soon as possible!
4. Try to control what you do
In other cases, it may happen that that person is controlling and wants to know everything you do.
In no way can this behavior be normalized and confused with providing care to the couple. One thing is that he is aware of you because he loves you and another is that he is obsessed with your life.
Worse still is that he starts telling you what to do and what not to do, that represents a long-term risk and loss of self-control.
Now that you know what are the alerts that you should identify when you go out with someone, I invite you to know the late signs when you have already established an emotional bond.
Late signs when you are in a relationship with someone
These are the signs to which you should pay the most attention because they show that this person does not have good intentions. Rather, you could be getting involved in a difficult relationship in which you would be taking risks.
Anyway, if you want more information, you can see the article of scielosp.org, in which you will be guided in more depth on the subject and, in addition, take careful note of the following indications:
1. Check your cell phone and social networks
It is not pleasant for anyone when a person, whom you are just getting to know, arrives to review your activity on social networks. Much less is it admissible that you want to take your cell phone and see what you do, who you talk to or what time you connect.
Be very careful because it is an invasion of your privacy and it is surely looking for reasons to accuse you.
This is another sign of the impending love failure because, if there is no trust and autonomy, sooner or later it stops working.
2. Has destroyed things of yours
If that person has reached the point of intentionally damaging your things in a tantrum, it’s time for you to walk away. Do not wait for this to increase and end what you want most.
A person you’re just dating who loves you just doesn’t do that. Respect is essential in any relationship, no matter if they are just starting or have been for a long time.
No one has the right to destroy your things, be very clear. Also, this is not part of the common couple problems.
3. It scares you
Another warning sign that you cannot ignore is the intention to cause you fear in some way.
This kind of thing has no positive basis, it’s just part of his way of manipulating. Normally, someone who does this feels that this way they will have control over you and you won’t let them.
He does not see you as a person but as an object or property with which he can do whatever he wants. An example of this is when he tells you to be careful because he is watching you, or when he tells you that he will hurt himself if you finish him.
4. Threatens to hit you
Last but not least, you must know how to identify if you are at physical risk when you start dating someone.
That is, if that person threatens to hurt you, get away as soon as possible and do not wait for the action to take place.
Do not ignore this aggressive attitude because, sooner or later, it can become a reality that you get hit and lose the benefit of self-control.
No matter how light the blow may be, aggressions have no levels and if that limit is exceeded you must leave.
The best advice in this case is to run away, run away from that person as soon as possible and do not wait for them to carry out their threats.
If you look at all these alerts that you have to identify when you go out with someone, you will have how to know if he is your ideal man or not, in addition, you will not take greater risks and you will be able to get away in time.
It’s never too late to figure things out and do what’s best for you.
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