Open relationship – what is it, advantages and rules. Free relations between a man and a woman have become the norm of modern society. This form of behavior is not imposed by society, but this format of relationships is increasingly preferred not only among young, but also mature couples. Partners have the right to privacy outside the union, are not required to report to each other, and are not burdened with any obligations.
For some, such relationships are immoral, but for others they help save the marriage. Is it possible to keep love for a friend when it is allowed to “go to the side”, what are the pros and cons of an open relationship, let’s try to figure it out.
Free relationship format
An open relationship is a model of behavior between partners when they are satisfied with communication with each other without a stamp in the passport and responsibility. A synonym for the expression “open relationship” is sex without obligations. That is, everyone is free to enter into an intimate relationship with anyone, without coordinating this with the second half.
Classic relationships differ from free relationships in the presence of jealousy and control. In marriage, there can also be trips to the side, but they are unauthorized, and cause a feeling of jealousy in the second rug. There can be no jealousy in an open relationship.
There are many types of open relationships. Each couple independently determines the boundaries of what is permitted. Relationships can be partial, i.e. flirting on the side, walking, visiting restaurants, movies, but without sex is allowed. It’s kind of like a friend zone. Intimacy only in a couple!
A full open relationship is when any connections on the side are allowed. Having a common budget, a joint living space and even children, partners give each other absolute freedom of action. In the presence of his companion, the partner can arrange a date, look for a temporary or permanent lover.
In practice, full free relations often evolve first into partial, and then into classical ones. Having met, a man and a woman have a pleasant time, not limiting each other in anything. Then they have feelings. And they negotiate freedom without sexual infidelity.
And when people get so close that they begin to trust each other, they try to create a stronger alliance. This is how a classic relationship arises – marital.
There are other types of open relationships:
- Guest marriage. The relationship is registered in the registry office, but the spouses do not live together, but visit each other. They can live in different cities and countries, there is no common life, but there is a certain freedom in relationships.
- Friendly sex. Friendship without sexual overtones, which sometimes ends in intimacy.
- Polyamory. The presence in the union of a third party by mutual agreement of the partners. This is a group marriage or the so-called “Swedish family”.
- Swing. This is one-time or regular sex between heterosexual couples, involving the exchange of partners.
Couples who prefer not to drive themselves into the framework of “normality” choose an open relationship:
- childless couples.
- Couples with high sexual activity.
- Couples who prefer diversity in partners.
Not everyone is capable of such a relationship. A free union is suitable for psychologically stable people who can forgive betrayal.
The Benefits of an Open Relationship
An alliance without obligations has two sides. Let’s look at the positive.
- Freedom. Unlimited freedom is the main advantage. No framework and prohibitions burden the union. Everyone is free to do as he sees fit, without worrying that the partner will condemn him. Such relationships are filled with ease, independence. The couple does not need to rush to seal their union, have children, they can enjoy each other and the absence of frames.
- Intrigue. Every date is unpredictable, special. Unplannedness gives the relationship a sharpness, stirs up interest, excites the blood and does not allow you to relax.
- Sexuality. The quality of intimate meetings, even if they are rarer than in the classic version of relationships, is much higher. Sexual life is filled with novelty, sensuality, diversity. The relationship is passionate, “with a twinkle”, because each new meeting is like a flash: you don’t know when it will happen. Partners meet in different places, sometimes sex happens in an unexpected place, and this fills life with new colors.
- Lack of “household”. The ship of free love will not break on the waves of everyday life. Such a couple is not bound by everyday worries, they do not need to solve communal problems, to run a household. Romance doesn’t leave a relationship.
- There is no need to adjust. No need to change your schedule, habits, abandon plans. You can freely enjoy the attention of the opposite sex, without fear of consequences. It raises self-esteem. In a relationship, the individuality of the partners is preserved.
- Respect. If the partners agreed to this format of relations, then they respect each other.
- There is no need to prove anything. In the classic version of a relationship, you have to prove your feelings for a partner, which can kill the ease and ease of communication. The free couple is not burdened with this heavy burden.
- No dependence (from each other, physical/emotional). No “critical” days, mood swings, problems and ailments affect the quality of the relationship. Partners try to give each other only positive emotions.
- Frankness. Only people who fully trust each other decide on freedom in a relationship. They do not need to hide flirting on the side, they can openly talk about everything without worrying about a negative reaction.
- No jealousy. Treason is not considered a betrayal, so an affair on the side is not a reason for a scandal, and even more so for a break.
- New experience. In a classic alliance with novelty, it’s a bit tight. In the free – full space. Novelty fills life with meaning, makes it richer, more interesting.
There are also downsides to this relationship. Without proper trust and respect, partners can drift apart. Independence kills the need for a constant companion. There are also sexually transmitted infections. Only people of the same convictions can decide on an open relationship.
Free relationship rules
If an open relationship suits both partners, they can last a long time, if only one is the way to nowhere.
Each couple sets their own rules:
- Understand for yourself (what kind of format is it, is it suitable). You need to decipher for yourself the concept of “free relationship”. Make sure you can accept your companion’s marches to the left.
- Negotiate thoroughly with your partner. Agreements should address the fundamental question of what is possible and what is not. Be sure to discuss not only rights, but also obligations. Both partners must agree to mutual freedom. You can set date dates, a time limit, after which you can not invade your personal space.
- Honesty. Talk about everything openly, heart to heart, without claims and conflicts. Even the most slippery and unpleasant moments do not need to be kept to yourself.
- No jealousy. Freedom of relationship implies communication with other partners on the side. By agreeing to third-party connections, everyone undertakes to forget about jealousy. Otherwise, there can be no question of any freedom.
- No feelings. You can not fall in love, make long-term plans. If this happens, freedom is over. It is worth discussing the situation directly with your partner and deciding whether to break off the relationship or take it to another level.
- Compliance with agreements. All of the above must be observed impeccably. In addition, partners can enter into a more detailed agreement, indicating the format, time and place of connections on the side, time spent together, etc.
- Distance. It is necessary to designate the personal space of everyone and not allow violation of its boundaries. Tenderness, hugs, frequent intimacy lead to addiction.
- No expectations. You should not expect from a partner that he will “change his mind” and offer a serious relationship, marriage, family. There should be no illusions, they spoil relations, look at your union soberly.
The rules can be changed and canceled at the request of one of the parties. The main thing is that the relationship should be harmonious and not bring discomfort. Open relationships are not for every couple. In such unions, people living at a distance, overly busy at work, deprived of attention coexist well.