Why do people prefer being alone?
The feeling of love is a powerful stimulus to action. But at the same time, it has huge destructive power, capable of destroying a person.
Each person grows up in different conditions, his character is formed under the influence of various factors. But everyone has a dual nature, which is reflected in the desire to love and at the same time, fear appears, how new relationships will affect life, how a loved one will behave in a given situation. Psychologists explain: that the fear of loneliness is replaced by the fear of intimacy and the person is at a crossroads, not daring to choose one direction.
An avoidant type of attachment can form when a girl does not notice the chosen one until he begins to meet with another. Or when a man plunges headlong into work, ignoring love relationships that take time, require effort and investment, both moral and financial, can suddenly end, accompanied by emotional experiences.
The other side of fear is manifested in the fear of losing a partner, hypervigilance, and constant control. As a result, such relationships do not exist for a long time. In the future, the second half, after experiencing emotions, does not want to start a new relationship, so as not to be in a similar situation.
Personal insecurity in one’s own attractiveness for the opposite sex, and constant balancing delays the development of close relationships and the person remains alone.
It is worth taking into account the fact that people do not need close relationships with others. Feel comfortable on their own. Experts note that the example of parents and previous love relationships with a negative outcome are of great importance in the formation of such an opinion.
How to overcome feelings of loneliness
Even being in a relationship can be lonely. This occurs when there is no mutual understanding and the opportunity to share their experiences with each other, when work interests are put above interpersonal ones. Conversations with a professional psychologist, increased contact with the opposite sex, attendance at public social events, and thematic seminars will help to overcome the feeling of fear of close relationships.
A negative experience can be replaced by positive examples, meeting positive people, happily married couples, and lovers who carry each other in their arms. The main thing is the desire to find your happiness.
How to start a good relationship
Many repeat hackneyed phrases that love does not exist. It’s hard to find and even harder to keep. Constant worries due to the loss of a partner result in disputes, and conflicts. The ground is set for separation.
To find true love, and not just a hobby based on external attractiveness or momentary desire, you need to accept yourself as you are, not to adapt to someone else’s opinion. The girl can play the role of the chosen one, which her partner wants to see. As a result, building real, living relationships will not work.
Sometimes it can be helpful to have a heart-to-heart talk with a partner. This will help to avoid conflict situations in the future, orient movement in one direction.
Couples may follow a particular scenario in a pattern they choose: having children, finding a place to live, going to the movies together, making mandatory home-cooked meals, etc. Although, in reality, the needs may be different. It’s just more familiar.