What is guest marriage? what are its pros and cons? If you say such a terrible expression as “guest marriage” to your mother or grandmother, they will tell many terrible stories that they saw on the talk shows on the central channels. Now you are in the right place to see where you are, and where you are.
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What is guest marriage and why is it the oldest form of relationship?
It is a regular relationship like a marriage between two people, except that the spouses are not living on one. Guest marriage is a broad concept. People can even have children who will live at home with one of the parents or alternately live in one place or another, or the couple may not burden themselves with such cares and responsibilities at all.
The only difference from simple relationships is the presence of official registration in the registry office. You will be surprised, but many scientists believe that this was the first form of human relationship.
The man spent all his time hunting, getting meat. And women were mainly engaged in agriculture and lived in their small communities.
Both boys and girls grew up with their mother and became attached to her female settlement, so strong family ties existed primarily between brothers, sisters and their mothers. Moreover, in this case it is clear who your mother is.
Sometimes men from one community traveled long distances to make an exchange with another community. Staying for several days in a strange house, a man usually left the woman pregnant, but had nothing more to do with the child. In the same way, it’s possible to keep away from it all.
What men are talking about. Guest marriage
By the way, it is believed that the first societies of people were generally matriarchal, and in a woman her divine power to give birth was revered, people have not yet drawn parallels between sex and childbirth. If you are lucky enough to have a friend
Why is the classical form of marriage now dominant?
The more complex and multifaceted a person’s life became, the more everyday tasks fell on him. Gradually, people came to the conclusion that the two of them could cope, and even share household duties. After all, it is known: the fewer tasks you have, the better you understand them.
What about today?
Your house is cleaned by a robot vacuum cleaner, a washing machine is washed, you can get to work by metro, and anyone can “catch game” in the form of money, regardless of physical fitness, and even more so gender.
It is difficult to explain to those who were born in the USSR or survived in the 90s: Then the family really was the most complete “cell of society.
In fact, the real argument that makes people today maintain classic relationships is that feelings require constant close contact.
Benefits of a guest marriage
- To a large extent, a guest marriage is usually a union of two full-fledged self-sufficient personalities. Everyone has their own career, earnings, homes, interests. Everyone is not ready to completely dissolve in a partner, this does not mean at all that there is no love – this form of love is considered true love.
- Personal space. Do you want to just lie down on a bed with chips after a hard day, and not run to the bath to make yourself a dude? Or just be alone with yourself, music or wine? In fact, permanent relationships are extremely energy-consuming, and for an introvert, this can be a reason to avoid serious relationships altogether. Guest marriage is a great way to save yourself.
- Life will not become a stumbling block. Habits, character, favorite scattered socks against your neatness or a ton of cosmetics in the bath No one is trying to change each other, to reshape the house to suit their tastes – after all, at a party you behave in a completely different way.
- Complete sleep. Different biorhythms are a common problem for families. A lark and an owl, a fan of heat and a fan of opening wide windows. You will be surprised, but for many it was the need to get enough sleep that led to the decision to choose a guest marriage.
- And most importantly, romance. Each meeting becomes a real date, you have something to tell, your time is valued, and by the time your husband arrives, you have time to transform, get a pedicure and go for sugaring.
Remember how you dated someone, how it was at the very beginning, when you could only get out in the evening for coffee? What are you doing, and what is the level of privacy that you have by the border? Guest marriage maintains the state of love much longer.
Cons of guest marriage
- The ideal relationship is a mirage. Until you see his nerves, bad mood, unpleasant habits, everything seems fine. For partners, every quarrel becomes fatal, because, unlike a couple in a classical marriage, they are not hardened by the hardships of living together. A compromise – where there is more trudnosty, so that it is possible to make it so that it is difficult to understand.
- Children are what many people start living together for. Most likely, you want your father to be as active in upbringing as you are, and how to explain to children that dad is a rare guest?
- Loyalty. Guest marriage is a monogamous relationship. But it becomes very difficult for those who are used to feeling confirmation that they remain loved and the only one.
- Every man for himself. Of course, a spouse will always help and comfort, but most of the time you will be left alone with your responsibility. In the case of the largest project, it is possible to do this in a new country.
When and why to choose a guest marriage?
Often people with extensive experience in relationships come to a guest marriage, and this was not always positive. Divorces and division of property, fear of betrayal, boredom and indifference. For adults over 30, a guest marriage becomes a salvation, it allows you to revive Anyone in the Heart, without fear of losing control over life.
Secondly – and mature people also come to this – everyone has their own established way of life. Rhythm, habits, work, needs. When Young Guys Enter Marriage After High School, Sni build an independent life from scratch, immediately taking into account the correction for the characteristics of the partner. Over the years, it is more difficult to change for the sake of others, even close people.
However, most often a guest marriage develops into a classic one after 4-7 years: one of the spouses increasingly lives with the second, or the couple has a desire to raise common children. Otherwise, such a relationship is almost doomed to failure.