What to do if relationships with men quickly get boring – advice from a psychologist? Most often, men quickly lose interest in women, but there may be another situation. You started dating a man and at some point you find that you have lost interest. Moreover, this situation is repeated systematically.
When there is a loss of interest in a man?
Usually, the loss of interest in a man occurs at certain stages in the development of events. It seems that everything was fine between you, then you find that interest has faded. This usually happens:
- after the man confessed his love;
- after the first sex;
- after the offer.
To it that the previous moments are there, it is with the mother, if it is not, it is not. If it came to the wedding, then the dress is tight, something itches somewhere, an allergy.
Why does a woman quickly lose interest in a man?
Note that this behavior is most acceptable for men. It is they who quickly get bored with women, especially after the first sex. Let’s see why there is such a strange systematicity in your life.
- The most common reason is spoiled. Are you all right. You are from a wealthy family, or you yourself have a good status. I’m used to everything revolving around you. You are spoiled for attention and perceive people as a thing.
- Excessive requirements. You have a certain ideal of a man, maybe it is connected with the idealization of the father or the adoption of the image of the image. More than one man is not able to compete with this invented ideal.
- Fear of getting close where you expect to be hurt. As soon as you begin to feel addicted, your unconscious helps you lose interest in a man. You are the first to want to leave a man, not to allow this to be done to you. To then proudly say: “No one left me.”
- Excessive demands on yourself. First you start talking to a man. Later you will realize that you are not up to it. In this connection, you leave your partner so as not to enter into STRESS and not to conquer unattainable heights.
- Hyperresponsibility. You perceive any relationship as something too serious. Especially if you love loneliness, you feel it like freedom. You can live as you like, travel wherever you want, again financially do not deny yourself anything. As soon as a serious relationship begins, especially if it is marriage, then you will lose this freedom.
How to save a relationship if feelings have cooled down?
- Fear of intimacy. As soon as a closer relationship begins between you, fear subconsciously pops up in you, and the baby stops.
- You are afraid to make a mistake. You are waiting for the best partner. You are afraid to take a rash step, to hurry up.
- An attempt at self-assertion. She lived with one, the second, the third, asserted herself. The man becomes uninteresting to you.
- You don’t want to see the history of the parent family repeat itself. Maybe, daddy walked mum daddy drank, showed an aresia w et d d and then consciously avoided eoren etogges.
Usually, these factors go together. That is, there may be several reasons for the avoidant behavior of men.
What to do to eliminate the loss of interest in a man?
The solution to a problem is determined by its origins. Of course, you should not immediately start a serious relationship with the first man you meet and go to the registry office. If you do that with parses, you should not ask for additional references:
- Avoid comparing the man in front of you with the ideal image that is in your head. No one can compete with your “ideal husband”. Look at your relationship objectively. Get your childhood dreams and expectations out of your head.
- Work on your self-esteem. You need to develop self-perception. When you grow up, men who are more developed and interesting as individuals will begin to reach out to you.
- Experimentation. Perhaps you are attracted to only one type of man, which, by the way, may not suit you at all. Go on a date with the opposite type. This way you expand your horizons.
- If you notice that all men quickly bother you, then communicate less in time, only on business. Spend time together according to your interests, so that later there is something to discuss. It is important to note that it is not necessary to travel, it is necessary to have an attraction, it is necessary to say that it is in the theater, on the wall, on the roof, on the wind. Yes, whatever. Just move, and do not sit in a cafe.
And the cafe, by the way, is not the best place for communication. It does not allow a person to be liberated. If you want more than that, you need it. Conversations will take on a lively color.
- Limit time spent together. Take a timeout during which you don’t date a man. Perhaps in this period you will lose your fear of responsibility. You will have time to miss a man, you will feel freedom.
- When communicating, set yourself up for sympathy. Look at the positive features of a man. Pay attention to his actions, what he does for you. Allow yourself to accept his care, enjoy his company.
Analyze, maybe you lose interest after your relationship goes to the official level. Often after this, men stop working on relationships. On the other hand, it is important to remember that it is not necessary.
In fact, relationships need to be constantly worked on, and both. They need to be invested in. Even if you are madly in love with the chosen one, you need to stir up interest. And this applies to both men and women.
Analysis of the situation to the smallest detail
Further actions depend on the reason that led to the fact that you started. Therefore, ask yourself the question: “What exactly are you afraid of?”
If you’ve had a negative example of parenting, you’ve got to refute the situation, Hers, ce through, You need to challenge your beliefs. The same goes for and freedom. Starting to reveal this reason, you will understand that it is imaginary. In fact, you do not gain freedom, but destructive loneliness.
It is not necessary to do so to the same thing as to any point. For each reason, pick up refuted situations, disassemble them to the smallest detail. To the end of the day, it is necessary to open the door to the next.
If you are losing your mind to mumodimo, take care of yourself, find out the reason for such hlen and eart. Also, the help of a psychoanalyst will help you, who will help you not only analyze the situation to the smallest detail, but also choose the most appropriate behavior for you.