What to do when a Girl ignores your Texts or Messages?

What to do when a Girl ignores your Texts or Messages?
What to do when a Girl ignores your Texts or Messages?

What to do when a Girl ignores your Texts or Messages?

What to do when she stops texting? The girl does not respond to messages: why it happened and what to do?

In texting with a girl, not always everything goes smoothly. At some point, she may start not responding to SMS, do it with a long delay, read, but not send anything in response – all this is called ignore by the common people. The same applies to cases when a girl does not even read the first message when you try to get to know each other. I would like to know the reason for this?

What to do when a Girl ignores your Texts or Messages? Today we will look at the answers to the question of why a girl does not respond to messages (spoiler alert: this does not always mean that your relationship is doomed) and figure out what to do about it. Even if your messages have never been ignored, I advise you to read this article to be fully armed for the future.

Why doesn’t she answer the first message?

Let’s imagine a situation: you haven’t met yet. You found her profile on social networks or on a dating site, posted pictures, added to friends (perhaps she even accepted you), but for some reason, she ignores your messages. What could have gone wrong if you haven’t even started chatting yet? In fact, there are a lot of options, and now we will briefly consider the most common of them.

She has a boyfriend

Very often, girls who have a boyfriend simply prefer not to respond to messages wishing to meet. This is especially true for those ladies who do not feel a lack of male attention. To check this, spend a couple of minutes actively surfing her page: the presence of joint photos or comments from a guy with unambiguous romantic content will immediately make you understand that there is no point in writing here.

She’s busy

It is possible that the girl rarely logs into social networks and does not view the list of incoming messages due to her heavy workload or study. Or maybe she, in principle, is not a fan of spending time on the Internet. In any case, if a girl ignores messages, this does not always mean that she does not want to meet you – sometimes circumstances simply interfere with this.

She has a lot of message requests

If we are talking about Instagram, then it is worth mentioning separately the cunning community policy that does not notify about messages from unfamiliar users. When you write to someone for the first time, your message, instead of a folder with incoming messages, gets into a separate list of “message requests”, which you still need to remember to open. But do not reassure yourself once again: if she read your message and did not reply, the answer is unequivocal.

She is not open to communication

And that doesn’t even mean that she has a boyfriend or is in love. There are different periods in life, and sometimes we may not be interested in the idea of ​​meeting or chatting with a guy at all. By the way, another reason can be attributed to the same reason: she, in principle, does not meet on the Internet, preferring live communication to this method. So you can try your luck again by catching it at the university or near work – but if you fail this time, you don’t need to try again.

You are not her type

If she does not read your messages on VK, Instagram, or instant messengers, most likely she has already looked at your page, understood what kind of person you are and how you live, and perhaps this did not agree with her preferences. And this does not mean at all that something is wrong with you. It is foolish to believe that someone can be liked by absolutely all people in the world.

Important! If the girl does not even read the first message, there is no point in trying to win her attention further. It is better to continue searching and start communicating with the one that you will also be interested in.

Why does a girl ignore messages if she likes you?

Just as the world is not divided only into black and white, so a person’s reaction cannot be interpreted directly. Especially when it comes to love affairs – here in general it is always and everything is ambiguous. For the sake of objectivity, it is worth saying that sometimes a girl rarely replies to messages or does it coldly, dryly, or in monosyllables on purpose, and now we will analyze the main reasons for this.

A way to get attention to yourself

When you are not reciprocated, it is at least always noticeable, and often very catchy. This is what girls are counting on when they suddenly stop responding to messages or increase the pauses between your remarks. At some women’s training, it is specifically advised not to answer the guy for a couple of hours, and in special cases – up to a day.

Desire to cause jealousy

What do you think about when she sits online, but does not respond to messages for a long time? I think it is obvious that at this moment she is busy with something more interesting right in the same messenger. Or someone? Lovers of easy manipulations will not fail to awaken these thoughts in you to once again increase their importance for you.

Fear that she is too accessible

Films, books, and sometimes caring parents often put it in girls’ heads that it is shame and shame to take initiative in a relationship with a man. Yes, these times are already passing, but nevertheless, some girls still have a fear of appearing intrusive. This stops her from answering you the way she does to a message from her friends – at the same second and without leaving the dialogue.

Striving to generate and retain interest

“The less we love a woman, the more she likes us” – these famous words of the classic (by the way, twisted, they sound differently in the original) work perfectly in the opposite direction. More precisely, some girls think so, who deliberately answer messages for a long time, hoping to seem mysterious or too busy.

The reasons are not related to you

Sometimes things are much easier than we think. Your interlocutor could not ignore you on purpose: no one canceled the workload at school or work, a parallel violent conflict in the next chat, a bad mood, and much more. In general, do not jump to conclusions if the girl ignored you for only a couple of hours or a few days, despite the fact that before that she was communicating normally. Look at the situation from afar and evaluate several factors of your communication at once, and not just the fact that she did not answer you for a while.

Important! If she does answer you, but with long pauses, your best strategy should be to calmly continue the conversation after her answers. You do not need to behave the same way and play the game of “who will keep the interlocutor ignored longer” (unless you support manipulation). Communicate with her as usual until she realizes that you are interested in her and the masks can be removed.

Acceptable ignore and alarms

Okay, we must admit that each of us at least once answered the interlocutor with short messages or did not write anything in response at all. There may be a million reasons for this, some of which I cite in this article, but now the main thing is not “why”, but “what does it mean”. When is it worth perceiving a temporary pause in a conversation as a natural element of it, and after which it is already worthwhile to strain?

In these cases, the girl’s ignore does not say anything and you can ignore it:

  • before that, she communicated with you lively and interested, answered not in monosyllables, and showed interest in communication;
  • after ignoring, she explains where she disappeared or at least returns the conversation to the same active channel;
  • it happens sporadically or rarely, mostly you communicate normally.

But when the absence of her answer suggests that she is not in the mood to continue your communication:

  • she ignores you in most cases, almost never showed interest in communication;
  • it lasts for a long time (more than a week);
  • she herself is an active and friendly person, but in relation to you, she is stingy with emotions.

Those who found out their situation in the first list can stop reading the article at this point. And if you got into the second – the next blocks are for you.

5 reasons why she is ignoring you!

So, you messaged and everything was fine, but at some point the girl suddenly stopped responding to your messages, showing that she no longer wanted to communicate. Do not rush to think that she is arrogant – perhaps the joint is yours. Here are five of the most common reasons that bring coldness to your relationship.

Your excessive persistence

If you write to her a lot and often, and in general, the volume of your messages is many times greater than her remarks, think about the fact that she might be strained by such activity on your part. It is always important to keep balance in a relationship. They are generally somewhat reminiscent of a tug-of-war, don’t you think? The more initiative and attention you show the less comes from the other side. And vice versa.


In the early stages of communication, the vulgarity from guys is always embarrassing and confusing. With no exceptions. You may come across a girl who does not mind joking on topics with “peppercorns”, but this happens extremely rarely (and, as practice shows, she can speak about the frivolity of her intentions towards you).


“Ayuu”, “Where are you”, “Where have you gone?” and other phrases always look like reproaches and make you feel uncomfortable. Who likes to be accused of lack of attention? This only makes you want to cut down on communication with your interlocutor even more. You will not be cute forcibly – this proverb perfectly describes a similar situation.


If you constantly complain about life, talk about stupid people around you and generally look like a gloomy and always displeased person, do not be surprised if the girl does not want to communicate with you. This is especially true if you are not particularly close and are just starting to communicate.

Inappropriate jokes

“Doesn’t your mother need a son-in-law?” and anything like that might be regarded by a girl as a silly move on your side. As a result, she can abruptly cut off communication. Inappropriate jokes mostly relate to toilet humor and intimate topics.

What to write to a girl who ignores you?

To abruptly stop responding to messages is a deliberate choice of the girl, which you cannot influence in any way. But the reaction to what is happening is still under your control. As an answer to ignore, it would be appropriate to write just one message – and below I offer three options.

Ask a Question

There is nothing strange in the desire to find out why your SMS is not answered. You can write to a girl who ignores you, with a direct question: “What’s wrong?”. It is possible that she will answer you and you will find out the misunderstanding that happened between you (if it was, of course).

Be sincere and honest

You can safely tell the girl about your feelings about the current situation. For example, by writing to her “Hi. I see that you are not reading my messages. If it happened through my fault and I offended you in some way – tell me, I didn’t want to do it. I appreciate our communication and do not want it to end. ” Honesty is closely related to self-confidence (and therefore highly valued), so if she doesn’t respond to this message too, be sure you did the best you could.

Plan B

Any ignore is a non-verbal sign that the interlocutor is not in the mood to communicate with you now. If you are not sure that it was caused by unforeseen circumstances and the girl will be back in touch soon, you should think about stopping the communication. In this case, your last message will be silent – just like hers.

What not to do?

It would seem that there will be nothing worse than ignore, so why not take your soul away? But still, there are things that you should not do if the girl suddenly stops responding to your messages. At least because there is a small likelihood of her return (suddenly she disappeared due to factors that were in no way connected with you). In order not to blush after its appearance and look confident in yourself, it is better to remove the ideas from the list below from your head.

Call her

If she doesn’t respond to messages, she’s unlikely to answer calls, okay? So if you are interested in the answer to the question of whether it is correct to call a person who does not answer in messengers, the answer will be negative.

Write even harder

Wishes good morning and good night to emptiness, stories about how your day went, jokes like “And let me talk to myself now …” are clearly unnecessary. You will not improve the situation in any way if you continue your messages without answers from her side. All you can achieve this way is to let her know that she definitely won’t want to continue communicating with you in the future.

Conquer by deeds

If a girl goes missing after a first date, many guys think they haven’t tried hard enough. As a result, they decide to attract her attention with romantic actions: they write poetry to her, offer to take a walk again, come up with surprises. But this is a big mistake: in reality, you only embarrass the girl even more.

Appeal to conscience

I agree that ignoring is rude and somehow not human, or something. And in this situation, one could come up with a lot of ways to say that something does not suit her in communication, instead of just stop responding to messages. But we cannot know why the girl does this, but we only have the result. So all you can do in this situation is to analyze your past words and actions and think if you can somehow minimize the likelihood of repetition of ignorance in the future. And there is no need to read morals.


Yes, ignoring is unpleasant. But we’re talking here about the ideal scenario? In it, you behave proudly and accept the situation as it is. This is masculine, but making fun and irony about the fact that you were not appreciated is not very much.

Important! All you can do if a girl ignores you is write to her one last time, asking what happened. If there is no reaction, then the answer has already been given.

Can everything change?

What to do when a Girl ignores your Texts or Messages? If a girl does not answer you, this does not always mean that your communication has come to naught. In the future, things can easily return to normal. There are a lot of possible scenarios:

  • the girl will appear in touch and explain that her blackout was caused by unforeseen circumstances, after which your communication will resume;
  • it turns out that you have offended her in some way, but a simple conversation will help to return everything to its place;
  • the reasons for ignoring her will not be connected with you at all and soon she will get in touch;
  • it turns out that at first you were unsympathetic to her, but then she will see something special in you, fall in love and begin to initiate communication herself, and so on.

What to do when a Girl ignores your Texts or Messages? In the end, you can always tell yourself that she is busy, sick, not in the mood, busy at work … There is a hopeful excuse for any situation. But you probably yourself understand that we always have time for those who are important to us… It may not sound too encouraging, but it is better to assess the situation objectively and understand that the girl does not want to communicate with you by texts or messages, on time. You deserve an interlocutor who will be as interesting as he is to you!

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