Why does a man appear and disappear without explanation again and again? Is it familiar when you seem to communicate harmoniously, and there seems to be a development in dynamics, and then a man just? You, it seems, have already let go of the Situation, and you begin to forget about him, but it wasn’t there – the man, like a whirlwind, bursts into your life again. And then the swing begins: departure-arrival-departure …
How to understand such a man?
They say that women are complex, and sometimes understanding their actions and actions is an almost impossible task. What’s next: it’s possible to say, it’s okay, it’s not like that? Is it possible in such situations to make a division into: women are generally not understandable, and men are consistent?
The declared theme speaks for itself: it is not always possible to understand the motive of a man. If you are faced with similar “Swings”, When it comes, it goes, our task is to help you figure out what exactly it is connected with.
And then the choice will be yours: once and for all break off such relationships, or try to maintain a balance in favor of their stability.
Why does a man arrange a “swing”
The reasons can be very different, and it may not be about you at all.
Freedom is like a life credo
Name it by clicking on it, no where you want it.
- a woman with a trailer;
- old maiden, and so on.
And with a completely different semantic component of the definitions associated with the status of a man:
- macho, etc.
The fundamental basis of such different perceptions, as you understand, are stereotypes: they say, if a woman is free and single, then this is equivalent to the fact that no one needs her.
And a completely different perception regarding a man: lonely means free and inaccessible.
And if we summarize all of the above, we get the following:
- A man is afraid of losing, along with so freedom, and the status of the demanded and inaccessible “macho man”. That is why he rushes back and forth. On the one hand, he likes a woman, and he does not mind going into debt with her, but on the other hand, the prospect of losing freedom, and with it the status of “inaccessible” – scares him.
Does the man appear or disappear?
A man does not take a woman seriously
The accent can be that the feelings of a woman for a man are simply indifferent. He doesn’t care how she feels when he disappears. ABSOLUTELY INDIFFERENTNO that because of his swing, a woman cannot switch to someone else.
The fundamental element is that there are no mutual feelings for a woman, and sometimes there is even no sympathy. In fact, there is the usual calculation: “While I am alone, it is beneficial for me to be with this special person.” No, as soon as someone more or less corresponding to his criteria appears on the horizon, the man leaves again.
And the question arises: what drives a woman when, over and over again, she believes that something serious can happen with this man, and on the basis of these beliefs, she accepts him again?
There may be several factors:
- Fear of being alone
- Distorted understanding of love
- A woman’s lack of adequate self-esteem
- Instilled false beliefs and attitudes
- Stereotypes: one means something is wrong with you.
- Adele syndrome, when a man takes advantage of a woman’s obsession, and simply plays with her.
If something resonates specifically with you, it is important to unwind this tangle to the true root of the problem. Having worked it out, you will be freed from unnecessary relationships. As you might have guessed by yourself, when a man does not take a woman seriously, he will be with her until he finds, as they say, his soul mate.
Simply put, no matter how cruel it sounds, but you have no future, as long as you are not the main character, but just a pawn, which, without a twinge of conscience, can be sacrificed at any moment.
Man does not understand himself
Yes, it also happens that when a man does not understand himself, in terms of what he needs, he takes a shaky position. In the case of the position, it is not possible to present it to the store: to the building, it is necessary to do so. According to the problem with the crooks, it is easy in the mouth. Until he understands himself, no woman will be taken seriously by him.
With a high probability, we can say that the man is not confident in himself. And the foundation of uncertainty, as indicated above, is a misunderstanding of oneself as a whole person. Therefore, it seems that the neighbor’s wife is more beautiful, and the colleague’s is more versatile, while the friend’s is more tender and feminine. As you can see, a man collects in parts the image of a woman, from separate, accent components.
It means that it does not take into account a number of important details. For example, beautiful, can be unfaithful and mercenary, and besides appearance, have nothing else. It will be difficult with such a woman, due to permanent tension. And again, it should be borne in mind that beauty is a subjective concept. Everyone has individual tastes and preferences.
It is easy to guess that with such an approach to choosing a life partner, a man will never meet a woman who fits his criteria. According to the section, the partners have some abstracts and individual numbers.
This is the man for whom the concept of loyalty is nothing more than an empty phrase. The only person he is true to is himself! A woman will be perceived as a sexual partner, nothing more. Therefore, and goes in a circle: lived for some time with one, she became boring, moved on to another. Such a man is bored and uninteresting with one woman.
On the part of a woman, it is a great delusion to sincerely believe that he will ever change and settle down. Let’s tell you a secret: the older a person becomes (it doesn’t matter if it’s a man or a woman), the more his habits and way of life “strengthen”. And in order for a person to change, something must happen in his life that will completely change his worldview. In this case, the force of change should be sufficiently high. Otherwise, he simply will not come to rethink.
Negative previous experience
It is easy to guess that we are talking about something traumatic and painful. Forgive me for the comparison, as it is often applied to women, but a man, in this case, is like a bird with broken wings. And in order not to completely lose his balance, it is easier for him to turn on protection in the form of a distance than to experience grass again.
Therefore, as soon as a man feels that a woman begins to “sneak” into his inner world, and is already standing at the edge of those boundaries, having crossed which, he can hypothetically cause harm, figuratively speaking, the process of evaporation occurs. Yes, he will return to the woman, but only after he has laid siege to his feelings for her, that is, he has strengthened his inner boundaries.
We can safely say that the “swing” is nothing more than a defensive reaction of the psyche. In fact, wanting to protect himself, a man is captured by false ideas about protection: if a woman is not indifferent to him, and everything suits her – the distance itself is the same traumatic factor. Only he “beats” from the other side.
With this approach to relationships, both are unhappy: a woman, because she does not understand the motives of a man, and he, in turn, deprives himself of the opportunity to be with his beloved in the long term!
Another of the common reasons why a man “storms” in a relationship. As soon as certain obligations appear in order to get away from their burden, it is easier for a man to get away from a woman who is trying, as they say, to hang these obligations on him. In most cases, we are talking about when a woman has problems of a certain kind, and a man is not a bad guy.
And they managed without him and everything was decided.
Don’t cling to the person
Our task is not just to highlight the reasons, but also to help you make the right decision. As you can see, in some cases, it’s better to let the man go. Let youhodit in a long voyage, but already without you. Because there will definitely be nothing good with such a man. On the other hand, treat two words, and let’s live!
No longer than that, it is necessary to carry out the necessary research, it is necessary to procure foreign roads and streets. Otherwise, letting go of one, you will meet a new man, but with a very similar “internal configuration”!
It should also be borne in mind that in some cases it is important to help a man understand himself, when you know for sure that there was a traumatic experience, and you understand that the reason for leaving is nothing more than mental protection.