Why does an ex-boyfriend write after years, but does not offer anything? A couple of months ago, you finally put an end to an unsuccessful relationship with a man. I breathed freely again, you look at the world with the eyes of a completely peaceful woman, you even stopped winding yourself up on the topic: why did a fiasco happen in such a seemingly beautiful and serene love.
After all, they fled ugly, with quarrels and scandals, mutual debriefing with the transition to personalities, mutual died. And then, like a bolt from the blue, a persistent stream of messages from a former partner rained down on you: hello, how are you, let’s talk?
What to think about?
A swarm of thoughts inevitably swirled in his head: he still loves, realized that he was wrong, changed his mind, upset, n. Convulsive movements involuntarily push hands in order to quickly answer, write, call, identify themselves, find out, satisfy their greedy curiosity: what are all these attempts for?
Thoughts are feverishly wandering at the crossroads: to return everything back, no, not to be deceived and not to believe. You don’t want to consult with your girlfriends, your mother and older sister, who wiped away your tears after parting, will not understand, and colleagues or classmates around you are not at all aware of the volcano of passions that is flaring up inside you now.
Stop and cool off, my gullible companion. Yes, a positive turning point after the collapse of a relationship sometimes also happens, as well as well-thought-out tactics in the name of other goals on the part of an ex-boyfriend, husband, lover.
Come on, we will now tell you about the possible reasons for the rekindled interest of your ex-lover, and you think and analyze: what is most like a new surge of his flirting and promises.
The former writes and calls? Why are ex-men coming back?
Pitfalls of a sudden resurgence of interest
We have already buzzed all your ears about the fact that men and women are creatures from 2 different planets: Mars and Venus Psychologist John Gray described everything in the most detailed way in his population Labor, If you want, you will look through and restore it in memory. So that’s what we are for, but to the fact that we live, perceive the world, love and feel we with the opposite sex-cheers at all times. We can be a little similar in some ways, never the same in our views and actions.
So, while you are coming up with answers to the burning question: why is the former suddenly writing to you again, he, with his plans, may not fit into the framework of your invented explanations at all, but appeal to you because:
- pragmatist to the tips of his nails, the owner of analytical thinking and urgently needs to check: did he make a mistake by breaking up with you, moreover, you surfaced in his memories, most likely due to the fact that something in his life went awry, and you she was such an enviable comforter in such cases;
- decided to check how strong your affection for him was, to observe how you react, if with joy or anger, then you still love, and this will instantly raise his self-esteem, and if it is cool and indifferent, then write is gone, he is no longer in the epicenter of your thoughts and feelings, you may have already found a replacement for him, and this is an annoying click on his plane;
- accidentally witnessed that you are carefree and quite happy, you are not in a hurry to throw yourself on his neck and admire, you are cold, calm, confident in your abilities, and this is such a nuisance for a hunter-producer who lost in his experiments, a male with a loud ego, which is straight ay -ay-ay;
- the next impetus for action is banal boredom and entertainment that suddenly came to mind: should I excite my ex-partner, she, when puzzled, is so sexy and emotional, why not warm up an insipid evening by this fire;
- he is a curious nature, prone to psychological experiments, he was sitting dignifiedly and nobly, and then on TV they showed a resort where you rested together or repeated a film that once enraptured you together, let me think, I’ll remind her of myself and look at response;
- a desire to brag about new successes already achieved without you came up, maybe he paid off the mortgage that you started to pay off together, and he looks like a good fellow, he did it himself, changed the car to a more prestigious brand, and there weren’t enough spectators, bought a new sweater from among those that you always liked, but there is no one to show off;
- I wanted to satisfy my sexual hunger, remembering how good you were in bed, otherwise you again have to spend money on gifts, seduce, push your “peacock tail”, beckon with the beauty of a long-untrained body, persuade, prove that you are a skilled lover and an experienced partner for carnal pleasures, and too lazy to mess with it;
- rushed into a game called – increase my own opinion of myself, after all, no one told him for so long that he was a wise eagle, a strong lion, a mighty leopard, moreover, the center of someone’s female universe, we urgently need to stretch a thread to you and return it even for a moment;
- amuses herself, amuses herself, poses in front of her friends on a head clouded with hops: now one call or a message, and she will come running like a pretty little slave, a submissive wife, an obedient slave, leaving everything on the way.
In fact, all these points are just extended exercises and tactics within the framework of the main thing for a man: to prove to himself and others that his decision to part with you was not stupid and reckless, that he is still hoo-hoo, the dream of all women in a row and your missed chance. Don’t give in to these provocations.
Positive and respect
Not a single sane person will row all the bottom of the comb, and we are not born with a bast and we are not prophets in our own.
We speak as if in spirit: sincere impulses to return at any cost the offended, abandoned, who prefers, after heinous deeds, betrayal, betrayal, to leave forever a woman, or at least her good disposition, in the nature of love relationships are not so rare, they are not a mossy relic. Right now, we will give you a mountain when you can believe and listen to the ex-man who suddenly hit after a break in stormy writings addressed to you:
- He regretted 100 times that he was so stupid and let you go.
For a long time I did not dare to build new bridges, I thought over each word, erased and wrote phrases repeatedly, before deciding to appeal to you: hello, how are you, let’s talk? You are ready to try to “glue a broken cup” out of sad fragments – then go for it. She has already created a prototype of a new relationship, you go on the first timid dates with another partner, you met true love, which you didn’t even dream of – don’t Julia and confess right away.
- All Your “Former” Partnership Now seems to Him to be an excellent example of sincere friendship, and you are a reliable and decent person.
Because, most of the time in the family, and you don’t have a budget in this book. Nevertheless, he hopes with all his heart that you have cooled down, thought, weighed everything, do not hold evil, are not the keeper of bitter memories, and also appreciate those wonderful moments that once made you the happiest in the world. So why not put the proverb to the test: the best friends are ex-lovers.
- He still wants to prove something to you that you were both wrong, and you offended him so much when you parted, you didn’t understand everything, you didn’t evaluate everything correctly.
Innuendo turns his life into torture, he wants to put a positive end to your love and open a new page in his destiny without sins and resentments from the past.
- He is eaten by a feeling of guilt just from that breed, when “the cat knows whose meat it ate”, on he regrets what he did, yes, etc.
Your heart is already covered with a crust of ice. Behavior “signs of nobility, humiliating you and your loved ones. The words were especially rude and cruel. After cooling down, he decided to rectify the situation. The earth is round, life is long, why does he need enemies on this planet.
And we would also like to tell you in your ear that no matter what the circumstances of parting with the beloved man, each of us inexorably wants him to admit he was wrong and say: it’s your fault, you got excited, you are the best, even if we are no longer destined to be together. If and when it is not known, it is possible to have it. No one wants this and it is not necessary.