Why girls and women don’t want to get married? The desire to marry is not always caused by sincere and warm feelings. People bind themselves by family ties for a thousand reasons. Women want to have a party, put on a wedding dress, and annoy envious girlfriends. Many firmly believe that this will change their lives for the better.
If you ask an average man what prompted him to propose to his lady of the heart, he will answer: “Masha (at worst, mom) said she had to.” Therefore, many “strong and independent” women believe that marriage is a utopia, and they definitely don’t need to go there. Do you want to know what you really think?
Why girls and women don’t want to get married?
Anton Pavlovich Chekhov wrote that one who is afraid of loneliness should not marry. Despite the fact that marriage is considered the highest institution of society, in a time when both partners have their own careers and personal bank accounts, many believe that not everyone needs a family.
The reasons why you became an ardent opponent of marriage can “highlight” problems of a completely different nature: childhood traumas, self-doubt, low self-esteem. DIALOG with yourself is important for understanding what exactly prevents you from being happy.
- You’ve seen enough of your parents and you don’t want to do the same.
If you grew up in a complete family, but watched your parents throwing dishes every other day, it is logical that you might get the impression that there is nothing good in family life. The chances increase if your mother convinced you that “all men are goats.”
Yes, there are a lot of failed marriages. No such thing as means that you will repeat the fate of your parents. Family is like a pie. What filling you put in it, you will eat. A relationship based on respect for each other is a guarantee for two physical stability.
- You’ve already had a bad experience.
After a difficult breakup, the last thing you think about is female happiness. If an ex-boyfriend acted ugly with you, you subconsciously begin to see in every man you meet. Secure attachment changes to anxious or avoidant.
Marriage for normal people is the highest level of relationship. You have more in common: children, property, savings, friends. You are worried that if the past scenario with betrayals and betrayals repeats itself, you simply did not survive it.
- You don’t love your man enough.
When a woman is truly madly in love with her partner, she wants him to be completely her own. Marriage is more important for a woman than for a man. A treasured ring appears on your finger – a sign that you are loved and desired.
Reluctance to marry your boyfriend may indicate that you are still in search. You are not sure about his or your feelings and you are just playing for time. On the other hand, you have to wait for two years.
- You don’t like his family.
Three real reasons for not getting married
In a sense, we really marry not only a man, but also his relatives, who can turn out to be completely unpleasant people. Perhaps his mother already at the initial stage does not accept you as a member of their “Mafia clan”, and you understand that it will be worse further.
To endure your spouse’s relatives on holidays is half the trouble. You can always simulate an attack of inflammation of cunning and slip away from a family gathering. Imagine if your child looked like a mother-in-law? Scary enough?
- You are afraid that in a divorce you will be left with nothing.
In our country, it is not customary to approach the process of creating a family with caution. First, we trust each other with all the cards and accounts, and then we share the spoons our parents gave us for the wedding. No third-party guarantee, that is after the position is given, the details and the isical psychic.
No, you can protect yourself with a prenuptial agreement. Let such measures seem not very romantic, but who knows what awaits you in 10, 20 and 30 years. Taking care of the future is a sign of a healthy, mature relationship.
- You are not ready to take responsibility.
Men have fewer complaints. To have a status in society, they just need to earn above average. Everything. A woman, in order to be recognized as successful, must work on herself on all fronts: to be a caring mother, a loving wife, a good housewife and engage in her self-realization.
You understand that the role of a cheerful party girl will have to be abandoned. She will be replaced by a serious mother of the family. And the prospect of taking on the heavy burden of “family well-being” does not please you.
- You are afraid of change.
The desire to spend your whole life in a comfort zone is destructive. You convince yourself that you’re safe while you’re sitting in your shell. No in terms of design, then you should try two new things. Opportunities denied could have changed your life for the better.
Resistance to the unknown does not protect against troubles and will not help to resolve internal conflicts. With the understanding and support of a loved one.
- You have heard enough stories that the stamp in the passport spoils the relationship.
Your girlfriend recently divorced and now sheds tears about how everything was wonderful before marriage, but along with the stamp, the registry office employee sent an ancient curse on their couple. There is nothing more to explain why the kind and generous prince turned into Ivanushka the Fool.
It all depends on both of you. Marriage for life cannot exist only on love. If partners do not want to hear about each other’s needs, they will remain lonely and unhappy.
- You have too many expectations from marriage and you’re afraid of being disappointed.
The institution of the family has been slightly spoiled by the reputation of people who believe that marriage limits the freedom of a woman and probably ties her to the Home and children. How much your life will change is up to you.
As a rule, what happens to us is what we fear. Because we ourselves do not notice that we are doing everything to ensure that all negative forecasts come true.
- You think you don’t deserve to be a wife.
And in the depths of my soul, maybe I wanted to stand in a white dress at the altar, but you don’t love and respect enough. Therefore, you do not believe that someone else can love you. No problems are encountered in the context of problems in the special lists. You deserve everything that other people have.