Why jealousy is dangerous for relationships and how a woman can overcome it? The man and the woman liked each other, started dating, and maybe even got married. Everything seems to be fine – you can enjoy each other and your relationships, but often jealousy enters the relationship as a third.
Psychologists are sounding the alarm – a growing number of couples in which jealousy killed the relationship. What is that phenomenon, and how to prevent it from appearing in relationships, we will consider further?
What is jealousy?
This is a Painful emotion that can contain aspects of other emotions and, in severe cases, jeopardize personal relationships. It is characterized by the perception of a third party as a threat, for example, the husband’s jealousy of other women, the jealousy of beauty.
Emotion includes everything from the fear of being abandoned or losing something to intense anger. Jealousy can manifest itself in a variety of ways, including anger, anxiety, or sadness, and can vary in severity.
Factors related to the revolution:
- resentment against a parent
- misunderstandings in friendships.
When a fundamental failure of trust occurs in a relationship (Love, Parental, Friendship), jealousy rises to protect the psyche from negativity.
Similar to early experiences in childhood and adolescence, experiences of infidelity, as well as other types of setbacks, such as those from family members, friends, or colleagues, can lead to the development of inappropriate displays of emotion where fear of loss becomes dominant.
In other words, the psyche tries to protect itself from the phobia of being alone.
Like anxiety, this important emotion signals that a valuable relationship is under threat. It helps to maintain social connections, but sometimes the degree of jealousy becomes too high, and then the relationship begins to break down.
Agree, it is difficult to build trusting communications with someone who constantly suspects, checks personal correspondence, things, and interrogates you.
Most people are familiar with jealousy issues in relationships where the third party is perceived as a threat. This threat can be real or imagined. Problems that occur in the commanders, curtains, and other partners in the protagonist field.
However, if jealousy extends even to ordinary actions, such as a partner’s trip to work, a corporate party, to a grandmother, then this is already a psychological problem.
How to resist?
To overcome a negative emotion in yourself, you need to know the reasons that lead to the appearance of jealousy. As a rule, they lie in early childhood. Perhaps a person did not receive enough love from his parents or got into a destructive company, where his personality was subjected to lameserga. It is impossible to point to a single causal relationship. Usually, childhood traumas come out at a later age due to the triggers discussed above.
However, if that is the case, the name of the person who wants it:
- self-doubt, low self-esteem;
How to stop being jealous and cheating yourself?
- the presence of beliefs that constantly disturb a person (obsessive thoughts): derogatory thoughts about one’s dignity, criticism of one’s shortcomings;
- fear of “losing” your man, friend, or parent.
By the way, self-esteem can be inadequately high. In this case, jealousy is caused by the fear of losing your “level”.
If that is the way it is, it is possible to see it. If you want to know the location and the location:
- take care of yourself (sports, appearance, self-development) and remember that a woman who is passionate about herself has no competitors;
- accept it as a fact that you are not the mistress of your other half. Each of you has your own life in which you can choose your communication partners from persons of any gender;
- Use affirmations and meditations to raise your self-esteem and unlock your potential.
Such simple tips will easily help you take the first steps towards free communication with a partner and getting rid of oppressive thoughts. The emotions that you experience are sometimes so strong that they can harm your health. In addition, your man, being constantly on the lookout, will also feel bad and move away over time. This is how jealousy slowly kills relationships.
If you are jealous
This situation is also detrimental to relationships and your mental health. Pay attention to the following Predposylki vozniknoveniya jealousy:
- he always tries to meet you from work, from a party, even if it is completely inconvenient for him;
- if it is new to you and it is up to you to store partners in the project;
- after your conversation on the phone, he always asks who called, and if you came from guests or a party, you must tell about everyone who was with you;
- It is called the standard situation: two options on the wall, one where the home and the.
Neuroactive jealousy develops over time, so all possible manifestations must be cut off at the very beginning. You must set your boundaries.
Relationship effects of jealousy
For personal communications, EMOs of this spectrum are detrimental. At the initial stage, you may not see the problem, but over time, jealousy will begin to affect not only your personal relationships but also your social life. At the same time, it does not matter from whose side the EMOtion arises. The consequences are:
- you withdraw into yourself, and all vital energy is sent to the processing of negative emotions;
- your appearance and health deteriorate because there is no more energy to support them;
- in the dog’s mouth, next to the dog, and to the psychological level in which the three words are expressed;
- relationships can simply fall apart when the partner gets tired of constantly making excuses. At the same time, the jealous person himself is rarely the initiator of the gap.
Even though the problem of jealousy is constantly talked about, this condition can easily continue for many years after episodes of infidelity, even if the episode was fictional or has not been repeated since. Thoughts that jealousy is justified prevent the consciousness from conducting an adequate analysis and giving the necessary reaction.
If the situation has gone far enough, then the best way is to contact a psychologist. There are many methods for coping with negativity, but the most effective and simplest is cognitive behavior.
It is an effective form of treatment for jealousy problems and is excellent in both couples and individual therapy. During the Treatment, the person works, first of all, with the identification of current inadequate thinking patterns that help to maintain jealousy.
A psychologist will help you clarify the situation and break the neurotic circle, interrupting ineffective thoughts in your subconscious with an erroneous assessment of initiating situations.
On the plan for processing by pre-dating the titles:
- awareness of the problem, its scale;
- awareness of the ineffectiveness of their thoughts, insight;
- creating more suitable strategies that can replace control. It is important here to completely refrain from normal reactions and understand that current behavior only aggravates the condition and causes increased anxiety.
The work is carried out strictly in stages in the form of the so-called gradual impact, where at the 1st stage you encounter something that you are afraid of, but endure until it ceases to cause anxiety.
An example of this step would be refusing to check your partner’s phone once a day. Once this step is mastered and the situation is no longer a concern, you can move on to the next step, such as completely refraining from checking your phone.