Will a man return after a breakup – it depends only on you? Fundamental in the question is the word “beloved”. So you still have feelings for him. You are suffering and you feel bad about it. You cannot come to terms with the new reality in which you are alone without him. And if you have a common child, the gap is perceived as a double whammy.
The article will not be a placebo pill, but, first of all, it will become a guide for you: you will understand what absolutely cannot be done, and what it is worth directing the main “forces” to.
What not to do: top mistakes?
We will not delve into the reasons for the breakup in detail. They are certainly important as guidelines and will be touched upon in the context of the recommendations. The semantic load of the article, to the maximum, help you understand how you can return your beloved man.
Let’s start with the main thing, namely, with those mistakes that do not bring together, but on the contrary, only move the beloved away from you.
- Mistake #1 “Total Immersion”
When, after parting, (no matter what the reason was) you “plunge” headlong into the situation; if you start to suffer and live in the past, and also hatch a plan to return an unfaithful lover, then you will not get anything but permanent stress and possible depression as a bonus that will finish you off.
You, as they say, will score on yourself. You will be exhausted, nervous and irritable. What do you think, will a man want to return to such a woman?
- Mistake #2 “Never be humiliated”
Look, for example, the reason for the departure of a loved one was your betrayal. You are a human being and you can make mistakes. No, after, you realized that you made an irreparable mistake. And sincerely repented. How much you love your man, and besides him, in fact, you don’t need anyone else. No on is already gone. He is not ready to forgive you now.
The key word is “now”. If you start attacking it when the wound is not yet healed and calm down: beg and I can, they say, pork Just come back! ”, Thus, you will put yourself in a losing position. In his eyes, against the background of reason, you may seem pathetic.
To that it is not so, it is possible to do so, and to some degree, it is possible to do so.
- Mistake #3 “You can’t resort to blackmail”
Suppose the reason for leaving is that your loved one has cooled off towards you and left for another. It’s like a blow to the head for you. And you didn’t think of anything better than resorting to blackmail: either you come back, or I did something to myself.
Another option: if you have a common child, blackmail with a ban on seeing him. Like, come back and we will have a full-fledged family, as before, and if you do not agree, then you will not see the child.
Such an approach, first of all, sets against you. The emotions of anger and anger are used. And instead of “building bridges of reconciliation”, you will burn them to the ground.
How to get the man you love back after a breakup?
- Mistake #4 “But take the man by storm”
If you don’t care, you won’t have to worry about anything. It is strictly forbidden to get calls and bombard with messages. Especially those who have a semantic message: from repentance, recognition to adolescence.
Such an approach, at least, will create the impression that you are not quite sane and adequate. Moreover, it will leave a fundamental imprint in the form of a “cemented” opinion about you as a person who should be distanced from yourself as far as possible.
- Mistake #5 “Do not connect third parties”
As they say – winners are not judged! In struggle, all means are good. Don’t forget to ask for “kind of a stick”. When you connect relatives, friends, colleagues, and just acquaintances, they say: “Give him some reason! I feel so bad without him.”
Or “Since I am, no one else will love him!”, And as an option, others become active participants in the reconciliation process, that is, as a way of transmitting information, you will not only set up your loved one by forgiving yourself, but also embitter other people. And in the end turn away everything.
Moreover, the connection of third parties will put the man in an awkward position. And in order to get out of it, he will make every effort to erase you from his life once and for all.
- Mistake number 6 “To get the current sweetheart”
In this part, there may be several reasons for parting: mutual desire, and then a belated realization that you are not ready to let a man out of your life. Or when he left you for another.
In any case, the entire focus of your attention will be addressed to the new passion. For it is seen as an obstacle to your long and joint future. One gets the impression that as soon as this other one is gone, he will immediately return, and everything will be great and cool.
In this approach, you will only play against yourself. Wanting to protect the current one from you, the man will “rally” with her even more.
- Mistake #7 “Recreating your man’s favorite type”
Simply copying someone, “nullifying” yourself. Each of us has our own, as they say, chips. They are what make us who we are. Imitating someone is like playing a role in which you do not know the text or the plot of the play.
Imitating someone, you can look ridiculous. And instead of the expected effect, you get a completely different reaction.
Will a man return after a breakup – it depends only on you? What should be done?
When you and I have sorted out the mistakes, a reasonable question arises: “what should be done….. In answering it, the main steps will help you.
Step number 1 “Compartments all unnecessary in the head and soul”
Start the “filtering” process in your head and soul. Analyze the reason for leaving. Try not to dive into the situation with your head. Think about what conclusions can be drawn now. Try to abstract and imagine that in this situation the main character is not you, but someone else.
What advice would you give to this person? No wonder they say: “It is easy to give advice to others, but not to yourself.” This will be some kind of trick that will help the emotional component, and watered sober look at nature.
Step number 2 “Give freedom to your man, but above all – to yourself”
When you analyze the reasons for the breakup, and draw the appropriate conclusions for yourself provide. Time to scatter stones, and time to gather stones.” To it, to the case, to what it is.
Step #3 “Create the best version of yourself”
Look, we cannot force another person to love, appreciate and respect us. But it is in our power to make the other, without any coercion, fall in love with us. I began to appreciate and respect. And for this you need:
- love and respect ourselves;
- check “inventory of the storage”, which is on the outside of the store, and also includes the display;
- be interesting, especially to yourself. To do this, you need to expand your horizons, bring bright events into your life and praise yourself for, even unbelievable things. When a person is not himself, he begins to “cling” to others – those who will save him from boredom;
- improve your strengths, and not highlight your own shortcomings;
- Don’t forget that: “A healthy mind in a healthy body.” You should pay attention to your health and keep your body in shape.
As you can see, the “better version of yourself” is in the development and improvement, and not in resetting your own
Step #4 “Challenge him for a Frank Talk”
No in that case, if the emotion is still there, and it’s still there. Here, we can even talk about the effect of surprise: when he expects to see something familiar and so familiar, and another one will appear before his eyes – “renewed” and so unfamiliar.
No, it’s worth remembering: it’s pristine. It’s two people. It is very important to choose the right words that will help convey the depth of your experience, and attempts to return it – the only and most beloved.
Words that will give him hope that you really understood everything. You are ready to beckon. Words that will make you believe that there will be no more such black spots in your life.
Step #5 “Write a Letter of Appreciation”
If, for some reason, on does not make contact, and does not want to see or talk, write him a pineriz letter. Tell it about all your feelings. Maybe it will not give an instant result, but, nevertheless, it will allow you to plant a seed of hope.
Step number 6 “Plug in women’s tricks”
We are talking about the fact that the meeting can be adjusted. Make it look casual. No longer than that, on the other side of the field