Will I ever fall in love again? Can we fall in love again as strongly as we fell in love for the first time? “Oh come on … it will happen when you least expect it, trust me,” said Katharina, brushing her hair back from her face and taking a sip of coffee.
It’s easy for you to talk, I thought to myself … You are happily married, have a husband who loves you, whom you love, two wonderful children, and a life that some can only dream of.
I don’t envy my girlfriend. No, on the contrary, I am happy for her and I am happy that I can be part of this happiness. I just wonder … is there this happiness in love somewhere for me too?
It’s been a long time since I ended my longstanding relationship. It was a turbulent time in my life. He was the person I felt awake with. I was alive My heartbeat for him. For us. For our future.
He was everything I ever wanted. He drove me crazy sometimes, but only one of his hugs made time stand still and there was no one but the two of us.
Unfortunately, our ways have separated. Feelings and love are not enough if you don’t have the same desires and plans.
The exciting early days go by, the rose-tinted glasses fall off and you, unfortunately, realize that you don’t go well together and there is no couples therapist in this world who can save things when they are doomed to failure.
But that’s okay too. It’s part of life.
We fall in love, we love, we part, and then we meet again, we laugh, we cry, we fly, then we fall.
And I accepted that.
My ex-partner remained a fond memory for me. I don’t want to go back to him or be with him again. No, I have completed this chapter. I just wonder if I’ll ever see it again …
Will I ever again feel a rush of emotions caused by being in love? Melt like an ice cube in the sun when someone looks at me?
Find someone whose heart follows the rhythm of my heart? Someone who understands me without words and makes my face shine? Someone who will have an army of butterflies in my stomach?
Will I ever fall in love again?
“Hello, did you hear what I said?” “Yes, yes, I heard you. You are right. It will happen when I least expect it. ” “Let’s go now. We mustn’t be late. “
I said when I went out with my girlfriend … still caught in my own thoughts … Is Katharina really right? Is it even possible to fall in love again after the breakup and will I ever fall in love again?
Each breakup is difficult in its own way and it takes a long time to heal our broken hearts. How could it not be difficult when the person who once made our whole world revolved leaves our life?
We don’t just lose a boyfriend or girlfriend.
We lose our great love, our best friend, our support, our shoulders for crying, our psychologist, counselor, and entertainer. Everything resides in a person we love.
It is said that the time it takes to overcome a breakup is half the time it has been in a relationship.
Okay, if the relationship has lasted a year, it means that in 6 months our hearts will be whole and ready to love again.
But what about 10-year-olds or longer relationships? Does it really take 5 years to leave everything that happened in the past and be ready for a new relationship?
There are no rules in love so we don’t have a universal answer to this question, but there are signs that it is time to fall in love again and some things we can do to help make up the past asap leave behind us.
Just as everything wakes up again in spring and begins to bloom again, we want to awaken your feelings again!
If you are interested in which ones they are, then you should definitely read on.
Can I fall in love all over again? 5 signs you’re ready
It’s not strange to be in a relationship immediately after breaking up.
These are mostly the so-called rebound relationships or separation patches that do not last long and in which you can play with your own feelings but also with the feelings of the other.
Although we know that it is not fair on our part to the other person, in this chaos of emotions we just don’t know how to deal with it, so we seek solace in someone else’s hug.
We feel good when we feel this rush of emotions again that someone likes us, that we are important to someone, and that someone wants to be with us.
We believe that being a stopgap will help our hearts heal and overcome the separation. But in the end, our sufferings will only deepen and someone else will be hurt.
Therefore, it is very important to know that you are 99.99 percent ready for a relationship before jumping into something new.
It is fair to say that there are no guarantees, but it is always best to be clear about yourself, your thoughts, and your feelings first before you draw someone else into your life.
These are some of the signs that you are ready to love again and indulge in a new love:
1. You got rid of all memories of your ex
You gave him his things back and deleted all the pictures you shared? This is a good start and a sign that you’ve decided to take your ex out of your life.
The first step after a breakup, when we know there is no chance we can reconcile, is to get rid of gifts, pictures, clothes, memories, and anything that reminds us of the ex.
Just a quick look at the shared picture or a gift you got from your ex is enough to evoke old feelings and bring you back to the beginning.
If you haven’t allowed yourself that and you already notice that you remember less and less of him, you are ready to rush to find a partner.
2. When you meet him, you have no feelings
If you’re still in love with your ex and have feelings for him, it’s impossible to walk past him like you would an old acquaintance.
A fire still burns there when we see his eyes, his smile. We flirt, we smile and we are happy to see him.
In a moment we’re just another little girl in love who has met her prince.
However, if you can meet your ex, greet them, and continue your journey without feeling high, then congratulations. You finished with him.
3. You don’t mind and you are not jealous when he is in a relationship
One of the worst feelings in the world is probably when we see the person we love with someone else.
We are hurt by the fact that someone who was ours is now someone else’s and that he shares with him everything that he shared with us and that is why we are jealous.
On the other hand, you don’t care if your ex is with someone or not when you run out of feelings for them.
If you’re not jealous but happy that your ex has a new girlfriend, you are definitely ready to try and give other people a chance in love.
4. You can imagine being with another man
n the emotional chaos we find ourselves in after a breakup, we cannot function normally. We remember our partner and the days we spent together.
It’s like wearing a blindfold that doesn’t allow us to see other men around us, let alone imagine ourselves being with them.
The mere thought of someone else hugging us, kissing us, and holding our hand is unimaginable to us and therefore in most cases, we cannot be with someone else after the breakup.
However, by the time you start looking at other men around you as potential partners, you are already halfway to conquering your ex.
And if you can already imagine being in a relationship with someone and sharing everything with them, then you are ready to fall in love again.
5. You even want to have a partner by your side
Do you know this feeling when we are about to break up with a boyfriend or when we have been single for a long time and happy couples around us see that we feel a rush of jealousy?
We wonder how they can be happy and in love, just not us? How is it that everyone has someone, just us, nobody?
If you think about it without imagining your ex next to you, but it could be anyone, it means that you have broken up with them and are ready to find a new partner that you will be happy with.
Do you want to fall in love again? How to find a new partner
So far so good. If you pass this little love test, then you can move on to the instructions on how to fall in love again and experience a new spring in your life.
1. Allow vulnerability
What do we all swear by after a breakup? “I will never love again. I’ll never let anyone hurt me like that. ” Sounds familiar, doesn’t it? This is one of the ways we deal with pain after a breakup.
We build walls around us, switch on our defense mechanism and thus close the way to our heart. When you feel ready to fall in love again, the first thing you need to do is allow vulnerability back in.
In order to build successful relationships with people and trust, we need to open up to one another and show our feelings. And that is exactly what a successful partnership needs.
You have to give others the chance to tear down your walls and find the key to your heart. Only then will you really be able to experience all the charms of love again.
2. Work on yourself
No matter how successful, intelligent, beautiful, and attractive we are – there is always room for improvement! You feel better when you are constantly working on yourself, developing yourself, and noticing results.
I am not saying that you should do this to attract or seduce someone. Absolutely no way.
I say this because you will feel better about yourself and radiate a positive energy and if you attract someone with it, it doesn’t matter, does it? 😉
Develop your personality, pursue a career, attend seminars on various topics, read books, find new hobbies.
You can also change your styling. Trying out a few new hairstyles, spicing up your make-up and clothes a bit? Try and shine in full splendor!
3. Leave the apartment
Sometimes we really need a little rest, privacy, and time to put our thoughts and feelings in order. Especially after getting out of a relationship. Then we need the time in solitude.
We feel safe and secure in our four walls. But you have to leave these 4 walls at some point. Life is beautiful
There are so many ways to enjoy it, you just have to find the ones that bring you the most joy and happiness.
So first for yourself and then because of the partner search. Get out there, be active. Exercise, join some organizations, volunteer, hang out with friends, and have some fun.
This is a great way to work on yourself and make new friends.
Especially when you’re ready to fall in love again. You never know, maybe your dream man is waiting for you just around the corner, but first, you have to go outside to meet him. 😉
4. Meet new people
It is, of course, important to get to know new people. When you are ready to fall in love again, you should give people a chance to prove to you that they are worth winning the key to your heart.
You don’t have to look for a potential partner in every new man you meet, but the key to everything is not to be afraid to give someone a chance and not to let the thought that all men are the same guide you are.
You can meet men in different places, which leads us back to the fact that you should go out and be active. On the other hand, you can also try online dating.
There are so many dating sites like Tinder, Lovoo, Parship, etc. Maybe this makes it easier for you to get in touch with someone and maybe you will fall in love again through the virtual world.
5. Let the past be your guide
You need to get rid of the past and you probably did, which is great. But they should never be completely forgotten because there are valuable lessons to be learned from them.
Thanks to a bad relationship, you can find out what you want and don’t want from your partner. Thanks to the reason you broke up, you can make sure this doesn’t happen in the next relationship.
For example, if you and your partner broke up because you wanted to have children and he didn’t, then you will be looking for a partner who has the same vision for the future as you.
The past shapes us whether we like it or not, but at least then we can make an effort to make the best of it.
6. Don’t think too much
I have often heard of cases where people find someone immediately after a long relationship ends and get married within a month.
On the flip side, there are those who are so scared of going back into a relationship that they stay single for a long time and won’t allow anyone to approach them.
No extreme is good. You need to relax, give people a chance, and not immediately think too much about the possible outcome. We are like that sometimes.
We think ahead about some things that might happen, then get cold feet or become too clingy.
I know you don’t want to waste your precious time and you shouldn’t, but you should still go on dates and at least give someone a chance to conquer you.
Don’t think too much. Live the moment. Relax and enjoy flirting, seduction games, attention, and compliments.
7. Don’t force anything and be patient
Finally, it is important to be patient. Nothing can be forced and especially not love or being in love.
There’s no switch we can turn on when we’re about to fall in love or fall out of love. That wouldn’t be bad, would it?
Unfortunately, we can’t control our emotions like that. Don’t settle for less just for the sake of not being single.
To be in love is a wonderful feeling and I am sure you will fall in love again and get to feel all the charms of this emotional rollercoaster.
And until then, be patient, enjoy your life, because there is a perfect man for you too. And yes, Katharina is right. It will happen when you least expect it. 😉
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