what hides flirting without the promise of the future? The desire to tease another person with the help of flirting seems to many to be simple fun. Coquetry in our time has ceased to be a pure prerogative of girls; to make you think about yourself and leave unsalted slurping now men also love. And this is a violation of psychological boundaries, norms of social communication.
Whether in a romantic love affair or in relationships between people in everyday environments, healthy communication always involves being clear and direct. However, with regard to the sexual sphere, here people often allow themselves to demonstrate duality of intentions. Flirtomaniacs do not take into account that their actions are contrary to the understanding of honest relationships between people in general.
what hides flirting without the promise of the future?
Results of the statistical study
Researchers from the University of Texas (USA) and the University of New Brunswick (Canada) asked 742 students (143 boys, 599 girls) about whether they had had a similar experience.
It turned out that 60% of guys and girls did it at least once. Moreover, conscious flirting without continuation is most often characteristic of the female sex.
Very few of the respondents admitted that they were flirting with a stranger. As a rule, acquaintances or friends were the purpose of flirting. In fact, only 25% of the time, the ultimate goal of the flirting initiator was sex.
Motivation for lovers to flirt
What motives are pursued by those who give others ambiguous signals? Researchers believe that men and women are similar. Basically, the main motivation is the desire to make yourself more desirable in the eyes of others. However, women are more likely than men to seek to be attractive and thereby increase their self-esteem. Flirting people want to feel their own power, “omnipotence.”
On the other hand, men were much more likely to cite the desire to simply have fun as a motive, or to do it as a joke. Also, the respondents of the stronger sex were more likely to collect such cases in the “piggy bank” of their achievements – so that later there would be something to talk about with friends.
How do those who flirt feel?
As for those on the other side of the barricades, in a third of cases, flirting without continuation aroused in them a similar desire – just to have fun and enjoy the process of communication. On the other hand, about a third of the respondents said that they were not interested in these sexual signals, and they responded with indifference. 15% ignored coquetry. And another 15% admitted that flirting without continuing caused them depression.
Of course, this study speaks to trends that are common among young people. However, a similar trend can also be seen among the older generation. For those who like to flirt, it is important to be aware of their own motives in time.
Flirting as a test of strength
If you have become caught in the net of a flirt lover, it is important to consider: in some cases, a man or woman can thus not only demonstrate their own bitchiness, but also test you for strength. A person experienced in relationships with the opposite sex understands that not every person will be able to withstand such psychological games without losing peace of mind.
It happens that the addressee of flirting very quickly slides into the position of a “victim”, or begins to show aggression. For the initiator, this immediately serves as a litmus test, demonstrating the qualities of the character of this person. So it immediately becomes clear: is it worth transferring communication to another level, or not.