How to let go of a person to whom you are attached – advice from a psychologist. Throughout our lives, we meet many people. In varying degrees, they play a certain role for us. Someone brings us happiness, joy, love and friendship. And someone rewards us with lessons, albeit bitter, complex and difficult.
They teach us to be weak and strong, brave and humble. We take from them the most important thing for each of us. They nourish us, fill us up and inspire us. But it happens that a person walking nearby must leave, move away. Simply put, your life paths should diverge.
Why do people disperse?
In this article, we will talk not only about the relationship between a man and a woman. It’s about all the people we meet in our lives. Why do put ins diverge at some point in time?
- Change of INTERes.
At the very beginning, two people converge on the background of common interests. It’s great for you to discuss, strive, dream together. However, it happens that over time, the interests of one or both change. Then the time comes when there is nothing to talk about. No thoughtli o tom, it was so many ties that don’t allow for a calm and easy end to a relationship.
The conscience begins to torment. “Nesti tyajelo and brosit zhalko” – this is definitely about you.
- The social circle is changing.
Since interests can change, the surrounding people also change their composition. And if you still communicate with pleasure with the person himself, then with his new company, it’s hard for you to look for a common. As a result, you spend less and less time together.
- different pace of development.
It also happens that the interests are the same, but the “speed” of development is different. One partner strives forward, constantly transforms, achieves, changes. A development and evolution will occur in static sostoyanism.
- Disappointment and sorrow.
The partner could not justify the expectations of the second. Or perhaps specific actions or words led to a break. In general, the relationship was initially built incorrectly, because wherever there are expectations, there are no disappointments.
- Betrayal, lies.
Every relationship is built on trust. Be sure that you don’t have a problem with a partner. Therefore, if lies are mixed into the relationship, betrayal will break sooner or later.
Good warm relations are saturated in the first place with respect for the partner. If there is rudeness, neglect and arrogance, the relationship gradually loses that intimacy and sincerity, as at the very beginning, and the union is doomed to break.
- One-sided feelings.
When One partner Loves, worships, and the second only allows himself to be respectfully treated, there is no point in such an alliance. Every healthy relationship is mutual and comes from both partners. Everything else is a painful attachment and a drain of energy and feelings into the void.
How to let a person go?
In order to understand that a relationship is worth ending, it is important to answer the questions: “Is it okay for me, is it comfortable next to a person?” “What do I give him, what does he give me? Are our feelings mutual?”, “Am I happy next to a loved one?”.
As long as you have two people, you must have the complete set, the street, you must have it; then your bonds have taken on an erroneous, unsightly color.
It just seems that it’s easy to break up and let go of a person. It doesn’t matter how many people were with you, how many events and plans connect you, the termination of communication is always a very painful process.
How to let go of a friend forever?
Being in a friendly union, you shared all the sorrows and joys, exchanged secrets and secrets. No wasted time and the price is given for the new reality. How do you let go of someone who knows as much about you as you do about yourself?
- Rasstavûte vse tochki over “i”.
Simply put, you should find out the relationship. When each of you expresses claims, it will become clearer than the reasons for the distance and cooling in your friendship. Because and in the future, this can save both of you from the mistakes that you made while being with each other.
In order to let go, it’s important to forgive your ex for everything she did wrong. It is important to forgive yourself for your mistakes and the inability to maintain a relationship. There is an option to ask for forgiveness internally or mentally. Thus, you will get rid of the feeling of guilt, you will adjust internal contradictions.
Say “thank you” for the most valuable experience and incredible memories. Transform bad moments into lessons and trials. Realizing this, it will be easy for you to come to the point of gratitude. It is these feelings that contribute to wisdom and help to let go of past experiences with a light heart.
- Don’t be afraid to move on.
In case of betrayal and disappointment, try not to dwell on failures. Understand that the people who come into our lives are diverse. They are not all capable of causing pain. Therefore, it is definitely worth opening your heart to meet new friends.
Therefore, in new relationships with friends, try to be sincere and open, be yourself! Appreciate yourself, life. Draw conclusions about what you have passed and move only forward!
How to let go of your love?
With love, things are a little different. The desire of a woman to become happy in a relationship with a man sometimes reaches obsession. This is due both to social attitudes and to the feeling of inner emptiness that she so desires to fill.
Therefore, when an alliance with a man is on the verge, a woman tries with all her might to grab onto a thin straw. It seems to her that now everything will be able to return and resume. To let a man out of her life, a woman should:
- Recognize and accept.
When a relationship is doomed to fail, it is important to understand and accept this. Yes, it’s hard to realize that you failed. No this is not connected and all that is said is to say that it is solely on yourself.
Again, as in friendship, it is worth drawing conclusions about what divorced you, what mistakes were made by both. Be accusations and remorse, be blunt, decide how to behave in a relationship further.
- Understand why you need experience.
Analysis of the life path is definitely able to help make the right conclusions. And the Understanding that you were given specific lessons and what they are for you, will help you let go of a person without delving into His negative actions and actions.
- Acceptance of your identity.
The realization that you are not part of one whole, that the partner was not your property, helps to survive the breakup. At this stage, it is worth doing development, strengthening your integrity, hearing yourself, understanding what your body wants. In a word, understand yourself.
- Assess your condition.
If the attachment is too strong, and at every thought that you broke up, you begin to sink into depression and hysteria, even if a long time has passed, you should contact a specialist.
Codependency is a “disease”, a psychological attachment that can destroy a person’s personal qualities and interfere with living a normal life. In such a state, it is difficult to “soberly” see what is happening around and inside oneself.
In any relationship, there comes a point when people are no longer able to give each other something useful and valuable. However, there is an option to overcome the crisis moments. Second acquaintances and events
In a breakup, the most important thing is not to lose yourself, not to get angry at the whole world, to stop digging and start slowly, slowly. The movement can take leaps and bounds, gradually and slowly, but it must be continuous.
To preserve your integrity, perhaps only by taking a wise position, full of acceptance and love. Love for the world, for life. The ability to perceive reality, no matter how cruel it is through the prism of experience and accumulated invaluable knowledge, is also necessary.
Only then, apart from gratitude and sincerity, nothing remains in the heart. Nothing can stop you from continuing on your path in life.