Why do men write and call ex-girlfriends? When someone third unceremoniously and brazenly gets into a relationship between two people, you must admit that such an arrangement can lead to distrust between lovers. And this is half the trouble. People really love to think out and finish reality. And then it turns out: “I came up with it myself, I got upset, I got offended, I stopped all communication myself.”
So, the task of the magazine “Lovepsychologys” as your personal psychologist is to reveal all the ins and outs of the declared topic in such a way that there is not a gap left that distorts objective reality and leads to erroneous conclusions.
Look through the eyes of a man
Questions affecting interpersonal relationships between a man and a woman, a priori, include the days of that. Considering one, you can not ignore the second. That is why we invite you to look at the situation through the eyes of your man.
And so, he can communicate with the former for the following reasons:
- your man still has feelings or sexual attraction to the former;
- the former once left him, and communication with her is like an attempt to rehabilitate her own self-esteem;
- they have a common child;
- your man, such a rescue hero: always ready to help, and the former uses it;
- the former wants to return him, and the format of their communication is like ping-pong: he tries to “throw” her as far as possible from your family life, and she still bursts into her with a whirlwind.
Why does a man lie that he communicates with the former?
The issue of lies is a separate issue. Soglasi, sometimes it’s hard to find out, it’s too long on a ranite, and it’s not like that. Admit it, you also lie sometimes, don’t you? For example, you don’t want to offend someone, or in this way you protect yourself from unnecessary explanations and explanations and everything.
Lies can be both small and of such dimensions, when a huge lump of deception sweeps away everything in its path. Therefore, the extent of lies can only be determined if the cause is correctly “diagnosed”. Again, it is very important to consider from what sources you received information about their communication.
- His ex contacted you
- Someone you know told you
- You accidentally read their correspondence
- You have an assumption that they communicate, but there is no complete certainty.
Look, it is important to understand why, after all, a man hides the fact that he communicates with the former. This may be due to the fact that he did not completely let go of the old relationship, and now he wants to sit on two chairs: to be with you and with her.
When your boyfriend talks to his ex…
Things are different if they have a joint child: as a rule, such communication is exclusively finance. Believe me, after parting with ex-spouses, many men are ready to help not only financially, but also actively participate in the process of raising a child.
Another question is that their new women do not always like it: there is an outflow of time, and most importantly, money. It is necessary to understand that it is too small, and that it is not too expensive, because it is a fact.
Things are different if your man began to play such a Batman, who is always in a hurry to help. Again, in order not to injure you and not bring discord into your relationship, he tactfully prefers to remain silent about what helps the former.
Soglasi, if you are going to live there, is it not possible to say that you want it? Another option, which was for him, from a once beloved, was transformed into a good girlfriend. Here one should take into account one, but very important detail – men are more than a sexual attraction to a once desired woman.
Some men may say: “We, as a couple, broke up a long time ago, but she is a very good, interesting person, so we have kept the warmest and most friendly relations with her.” In the first place, it is necessary to have a component character.
That is, in your relationship, he lacks friendly communication, and did not come up with anything better than to compensate for communication with the former. Look, you can understand a man.
He, in fact, does not cheat on you, he does not feel anything for the former, as a woman, he is not going to converge with her. All he needs is simple, normal human interaction.
Yes, it also happens that the former acts as an adviser. Some people, whether it’s a man or a woman, need to discuss their ideas and doubts with those they consider competent enough. Therefore, the former, in his understanding, can act as an expert. The “buns” from such communication for your man, we painted in detail.
No, the key question will be different: what does the former get from such communication? It is likely that if she is a single woman, she still has the hope of getting back together with him. And the Friendly format of the dialogue is nothing more than a cunning female trick to hook the former on the hook: Make yourself, in His eyes, irreplaceable.
Things will be different if you do not suit a man intimately. It sounds rather unpleasant, but it also happens like this: everything in you is good, except for one, it would seem, not such a significant detail that can outweigh that scale with the rest of the “set”.
You can be both an interesting person and a beautiful girl. You can discuss any topics and issues with you, but, in a purely intimate way, there is no fire that a man needs, and in this respect his ex will win. Therefore, we can even talk about treason.
Agree, a “good” option for a man: you are for the soul, and she is for the body. In addition to the original, so that the problem arises, and what is in the drug: it is not the name of the child?
Another interesting option is why a man communicates with his ex, but at the same time lies to you, and in every possible way denies their “connection” – the desire to restore in his own eyes, once trampled self-esteem. We are now talking about revenge: falling in love with the former again, and then hurting her just as much as she did, when I did.
There is a type of man who simply cannot stand being abandoned. This is due to the fact that the last word should always remain with them. And here it turns out that the woman became the initiator, and she herself made the decision, to which he is forced to obey.
And such an outcome literally exhausts him emotionally. In this case, already a man resorts to cunning tricks. No before this, it’s on one of those days. Therefore, and it turns out: so that there are no unnecessary conversations and claims on your part, it is better to keep silent about obenishch.
Another reason for their communication, may be obsession on the part of the former: When she is trying by hook or by crook to return the man. And here we are talking about the fact that he is trying in every possible way to “get rid of” her, but he does not tell you just because you do not become a participant in their showdown.
How to react if a man calls and texts an ex?
“Samka” was posted maximally to date. From the Topic, you could understand that it is very important to correctly establish the reasons why your man, in a Secret from you, continues to communicate with the former.
It is the factors that are relevant to your particular situation that will tell you how to proceed further.
- If we are talking about betrayal and feelings for the former, then you should think: is there a future for your relationship?
- If the basis of communication is their joint child, and you are categorically against it, it is important to understand, forgive me for being direct, but there can be many women, and children, for some men, are perceived as their continuation, so it is easier for them to change a partner than to leave a child .
- If a man does not have enough communication, or something does not suit him in the intimate plan, you should “work through” the problem area in your relationship.
- Again, if a man plays the role of a helper hero, you need to connect all the female tricks aimed at ensuring that he performs this role only in your relationship.
And most importantly, remember, we gave you reasons, but how to eliminate them is a completely different topic. Two long-term psychologist “Female” in the armory in the local area, so that it is possible to see it on the actual day. No, but our task in this matter has been fully completed.