why do women get partners on the side? A love front is not just called a front. As long as you win one heart, you will experience many losses and disappointments. Relationships are often achieved with such labor that after that, couples need to make a huge amount of effort so that they do not fall apart. But for some reason not everyone does it.
Men are gradually losing their former fuse, and women think that they deserve more. And at the same time, no girl can explain when this feeling arises. When the time comes to understand – I want a lover in order to become desirable again.
In fact, there are many reasons why ladies choose this difficult path. Whether they are justified is not for us to judge. However, they all have the right to exist. Below we will look at why women are so eager to have another partner, and what factors influence the appearance of a third extra.
Why would you take a lover?
In today’s world, having a lover is a normal thing. Many girls even share their experience on how to have affairs with several guys at once and benefit from it. However, it is unlikely that anyone will turn their tongues to consider this natural. After all, all adults and educated people know that if you confess your feelings to someone, and even if you get married, then you can’t betray your promises. Well, or, in extreme cases, it is necessary to admit to the soulmate that the feelings are gone. This will be honest not only in relation to her, but also to yourself.
It is impossible to say that women cheat much more often than men. Everyone is equally sinful. However, their reasons for doing so are completely different. If men are most often looking for just sex without any obligations, then women are trying to regain the feeling that they are really desired.
They want to believe that other men still love them, that for their sake they are able to perform real feats and conquer. We can say that in this case the main component is feelings. However, it is not necessary that they be deep. Simple attraction, warmth, sometimes light affection. Everything that is missing in long-term relationships and marriage.
There is a separate category of women who simply love to collect men and are excited by the fear of being discovered. Is it a perversion? I can’t say for sure, but it’s certainly not a common occurrence. This woman does not need declarations of love or timid romance. In their vicious passion, they are ready to burn and burn everything around.
And what’s even more entertaining is that they can really love their long-term partner, but they can’t do anything about their own desires.
Reasons why you want to have it
Almost every girl’s favorite pastime is to compare herself to others. Or vice versa. If the young lady is in a relationship, she tries to find out what the ex-boyfriend was like. Was it better, and if so, in what way? Deep down they keep their own account, and when it is not in their favor, then the time comes for revenge.
This is one of the reasons why many representatives think that I want a lover. They are simply driven by their own scenarios in their head, where their boyfriend has already left them and returned to a more ideal former passion. And even if there are no prerequisites for this, it does not matter. She invented everything herself, she was offended and takes revenge herself.
Revenge in the arms of a strange man is one of the most unpleasant. Men painfully perceive the fact that his only and beloved fled to the side. It hurts their ego. And this is exactly what some ladies achieve, whom their current partner could greatly offend or change in the same way. Walking to the left for many women is not a walk along the beach at all.
They can plan everything down to the smallest detail. Choose a prospective lover for yourself, calculate on which date there will be intimacy and how they will disperse. There is an exact expression – there is no more terrible creature than an offended woman. And this is true, because a vengeful girl can have a lover and turn her whole life upside down.
The third reason is the search for spiritual and physical harmony. For example, a woman has a quiet and modest husband. He loves her, helps, provides, but she does not feel attracted to him, does not know what to talk to him about. And then a brilliant idea appears in her head – to get herself a partner for body and soul.
So that you can have fun chatting with him, and then have mind-blowing sex. And then go home to her husband in a good mood. Dissatisfaction with the current state of relationships is the most common reason why ladies decide to take this step. They are not even afraid of the consequences, because they subconsciously already broke up with their current partner and became free.
Marriage is a rather difficult undertaking. And the longer it lasts, the less room for passion and tenderness remains in it. Everything is replaced by habit, and if there are no financial problems, then such a marriage can exist for a long time.
But if there are problems with money, if there is no understanding of one’s future, if one of the partners plows like hell, and the second one sits still and does nothing, then many people have a desire to run away. Often, boredom causes girls to get themselves a lover who would help them remember how good they really are. To escape from a boring marriage into a colorful world where she is loved, wanted, showered with gifts.
These are the main reasons why women seek solace in other men. Next, we will look at the main pros and cons of having a lover, and also formulate questions that every girl should ask herself once she decides – I want a lover.
The pros and cons of cheating
Any person, if you ask him, will immediately answer that betrayal is bad. And you can’t find fault with this answer, because morality teaches us to be honest, and conscience teaches us not to do stupid things. But even so, there are often such betrayals that only benefit marriage. And sometimes allowing yourself a little more doesn’t hurt either. If you have problems in your life that are piling up in a crowd, then do not rush to get upset. Perhaps you have an easy way out of the situation.
- You have long forgotten the last time you had a normal rest with your husband and fully had sex. At the same time, the spouse himself feels fine and does not express any complaints. You want to experience the old feelings, again for a while to plunge into the exciting atmosphere of the first date and intimacy. In this case, it is useful to have a partner on hand who will agree to play the role of your “vest”. It is believed that such periodic sex on the side can only make marriage stronger, because women throw out all their negativity outside the home and spouse and return completely renewed.
- You want to keep in touch with your current partner, but you lack intimacy with him. Lack of sex is the most acute reason for cheating. After all, the desire for intimacy is the same physiological need as food or sleep. The less often it is satisfied, the more consequences appear. The weaker sex does become too sensitive and irritable. This can manifest itself in a variety of moments: anger over trifles, tears for no reason, a state of apathy and depression. A good lover in this case is an indispensable medicine. It helps to regain self-control and take control of the situation.
- This point is the opposite of the previous one. If the husband is great in sex, but in communication he is a cracker with a cracker, then here the girls can easily get a lover. And often not even to have sex, but for simple conversations and flirting. After all, the conquest of a woman should last a lifetime, and if a husband for some reason believes that “this fortress has already surrendered without a fight,” then he is greatly mistaken. There is a gentleman for any lady, so you should never tell your soul mate that no one will need her anymore.
Of course, every girl has her own reasons for saying these difficult words “I want a lover”. And if it is connected with an insult to something or a lack of something, then it always seems to be the most correct and correct. But even in the most justified situations of betrayal, there is always a downside to the coin.
The first disadvantage of lovers is their complete lack of control. This is not your doll or toy, which you can command as you please. A lover can easily spoil your game by simply impersonating a regular partner. And then your fun will end, gray everyday life will begin. It is worth remembering to be careful when communicating in secret with temperamental and passionate guys, because they do not like to be “pawns” that they use.
The second risk is the opportunity to fall in love with your boyfriend. Especially if he himself is not free. You can start this secret relationship only to amuse your ego, relax and forget about the problems in the family, but in the end you will suffer even more. Well, if the lover is a free guy who will understand you. But if he is married and is not going to cut off contact with his wife, then you have no chance of a positive outcome. In most cases, for men, a mistress is nothing more than an outlet that he will forget about if there is a chance that he will be discovered.
The third risk is remorse. No matter how simple-hearted you may be, no matter how calmly you treat everything, but your conscience does not sleep.
And she certainly will not let you sleep peacefully at night, especially if your spouse is a model of ideality. To betray a truly faithful and loving companion is at least stupid and as mean as possible. You must be well aware that you may no longer find such a partner for yourself or not receive his forgiveness when everything becomes known. Therefore, it’s better to think twice – are you so tired of everything to run into someone else’s bed?
life questions
If the thought of cheating on your husband does not leave you day or night, it is recommended to sit down and think it over carefully. First of all, ask yourself the main question – why do you want to find yourself another partner? Is it all about bad communication or has sex life ceased to please with its colors?
The reason plays a major role here, because it is in it that the solution of all problems lies. If you have problems in bed games, then it is quite possible to try to fix it without the help of third parties. Talk to your spouse, discuss claims, find a joint way out. The situation is exactly the same if you lack spiritual communication. Speak, tell, share!
The second question is whether having a lover will give satisfaction? Perhaps you are misjudging your desires. Sometimes it seems that only a handsome man on the side can solve everything, but betrayal only makes everything worse. You should not chop from the shoulder and jump into the bed of the first person you meet. Maybe what you need is not a lover, but a vacation.
The third question is whether my desire is connected with a feeling of resentment? Resentment and revenge are not the best reasons to have a lover. Because in this case you will not get pleasure, but only start to get angry with yourself. If you want to change only because you cannot forgive your husband, then it is recommended to simply break up with your spouse. After all, you can never come to terms with the fact that he was with another, and you will always remain a victim deep down. Just let him go and give yourself the opportunity to love again, only without secret meetings and deceptions behind your back. This will be better not only for you, but also for him.
Cheating on a loved one is not the best thing to do. After this, usually few people feel good, so they are looking for any ways to rectify the situation. If you do not want to become a victim of your own delusions, then the next time you have a thought – I want a lover, analyze it, or even better, just throw it aside.
After all, no one deserves to be betrayed. And if you do not feel any affection and emotions for your companion, try to discuss this moment with him. Perhaps he is simply not your person, and you should leave so as not to spoil the life of either him or yourself.
